Believing In You (Blue Bloods Fanfiction)

↞ Chapter Sixteen ↠

Season Two, Episode Eight

I found myself, at the end of the day, sitting in one of the rough plastic chairs that they have set up in the waiting room. The three kids sat around, the boys playing with Kenai, and Nicki working on her school work. I kept an eye on them all, so that the parents didn't have to, I even got Sean and Jack to do their homework before they started to play.

"Babe." I looked up at the sound of Jameson's voice, practically leaping from my chair and rushing towards him. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, leaning down to kiss his cheek. I muttered his name as I did, not expecting him to suddenly kiss me.

Giggles sounded from behind me, and when I pulled away from Jameson the two boys, Sean and Jack, were giggling and hiding their faces at the display of affection. Even Nicki had a smile on her face, I laughed, before kissing Jameson one more time, and stepping away. "Right, Nicki, you're in charge. I'm taking Jameson down the hall, we'll be back." Nicki gave me a fake salute, before the pair of us walked down the hall, Jameson's hand tightly in mine as we went.

I was leading the way, just trying to find an empty hallway, when suddenly Jameson pulled me in the opposite direction, down a hallway that I did not even notice was there. I suddenly found myself in a small garden, with a little pond full of fish. Jameson kissed me, his lips meeting mine in a sudden rush that left me dazed. His hand rested on the back of my neck, pulling me down slightly, my hands wrapped around his waist, pulling him close to me. The kiss lasted longer than it should have, and when Jameson stood flat footed on the ground his hand moved from the back of my neck to my shoulders. His fingers splayed wide enough to brush my neck as he looked up at me.

"What a greeting," I muttered, my eyes grazing across his features. Jameson smiled, shaking his head, before responding.

"I've been wanting to do that all day, as a thank you, for Pop. I went to see him, and he's alive because of you." I could tell that there was another and, so I waited, leaning against the wall behind me and tightening my grip on his waist. "And, because I," he paused, smiling, "I love you."

My heart immediately melted into butterflies, fluttering about me, I stooped down. Kissing him firmly once again, before pulling back and resting my head on the wall behind me. I said it back, muttering the words under my breath with a faint smile. It is crazy how every priority is exposed in moments like this. Jameson's head fell onto my chest, and we stood, for a long time, and suddenly I remembered that I had made plans with Sanfino. A glance to my watch tells me that if I don't leave soon, I'll be late.

"Jameson," I muttered, "I've got to go." He groaned dramatically, pressing his head into my chest, before taking a step back. I kept Jameson's hand as mine as we left the little garden, it took him a moment to ask where I was going, and I answered honestly once he did. "Drinks with Sanfino, and hopefully an insight into the family business."

He nodded, looking slightly disappointed. I sighed, not wanting him to be upset with me, before I could say anything else, we had reached Henry's hospital room and the family was saying hello. I apologized first, telling them that I had to go, but that I would be back in a few hours, and if they could keep an eye on Kenai for me. Frank said of course, before thanking me and telling me goodbye. Jameson said goodbye a bit more intimately in the hallway, leaving my mind reeling a bit as I walked out of the hospital.

I was glad for my car, and as I stepped into it, I wished I wasn't going. I'd much rather sit with Jameson and the rest of the family, waiting for Henry to wake up and be his usual energetic self. I didn't want to become the Alvie Persona, it wasn't pleasant for me. I had to lie, and pretend, and it felt like I was moving back in time, rather than forwards.

My time undercover before was much like this, I was exposed to massive amounts of aggressive peoples, and the only difference was I had no other persona. I became my undercover personality. I lived, worked, and was socially present in every gang circle in London. It was terrible, I had to watch every step I took, and I cut off ties with my old friends. The action tore my relationships apart, I missed my aunt's wedding, I missed birthdays, and the one relationship that I had been in fell apart.

Thinking back, my relationship with Aleczander wasn't healthy, but I was a new detective and in my head it was wonderful. We were so in love, then I go undercover, and when I'm back out, he's gone. No 'I'm sorry', no 'we're done,' just gone. And I realized I was the one in love, not him. I haven't seen Aleczander since, and I have no wish too. He wasn't an police officer, that was one of the many issues in the end.

At the end of shift, when I'm tired and worn out from what I had seen that day, Aleczander didn't understand what it was like. A accountant rarely saw a dead body on a week to week basis.

But Jameson, he understood, but that isn't the only part of our relationship that matters. He cares, we both care, about each other, and the differences between the pair of us make the relationship work. Plus he's adorable, and lovable, and kind. Family matters, work matters, relationships matter to him. I have to admit, it's rather dashing of him. To be so open-hearted about what matters.

I can tell I'm going to learn a lot from him.