Life is Beautiful

Beautiful Dreams

Sam held the blanket closer to him as he looked across the room at Meadow who looked swallowed by her clothes.  He hadn’t noticed before but she had lost a lot of weight.

“Meadow,”

Sharp brown eyes, the color of the warmest chocolate looked up at him. 

He swallowed as her eyes weren’t the same, weren’t full of laughter and joy as they had five months ago.  And so much of it was his fault.  If only he would’ve been more careful that night, then everything wouldn’t have fallen on them as it had.  He wanted to ask so much, but didn’t want to see her draw away even further from him.  “Why,” He swallowed feeling his voice strain. “Aren’t you going to school?”

Meadow froze.    

“I know you already have more than enough credits to graduate,” He tried to lighten the mood.  “But it’s our senior year. You’re missing out on-”

“Sam,” Meadow whispered softly.  “I just can’t.”

Sam clenched and unclenched his grip on the blanket wrapped around him.  “Meadow…”

“I can’t find it in myself to relate to our peers anymore.” Meadow said just barely above a whisper. 

Sam closed his eyes as he dispelled a breath because he sometimes felt the same. When compared to worrying about being invited to a party or not with losing your daughter before she even had a chance, it felt sometimes like as if he was on the outside looking in on his peers. With that another silence echoed the room. 

“Thanksgiving is coming up,” He said, hating the silence as it reminded him too much of that day in the hospitol. 

This time Meadow closed her eyes.  Thanksgiving. Already.

“Sam, I,”

“I didn’t,” Sam winced.  “I didn’t mean that Meadow,”

Meadow wrapped her arms around her.  Since they were in middle school, every thanksgiving, Sam and her always spent the day together.  It was their holiday.  He’d originally asked her out on thanksgiving even. They were both in seventh grade, the most awkward year for all kids it would seem.  The time when puberty seemed to hit the hardest.

But that year she’d taken her German Sheppard Luke out with her as they walked off Thanksgiving meal.  While they walked, they’d passed the community basketball court where Sam and his friends had been playing a rag tag game of basketball.   

Upon seeing Meadow, Sam’s friends had ribbed him while hollering for her to stop and talk to them.  Meadow did stop but only to smile and shake her head all the while laughing.  “No thanks.” She’d said before ushering Luke to move on.  But she’d only gotten one more block when she heard her name being called.  Turning around, she found that it was Sam Livingston, the boy who sat right behind her in Earth Space Science. 

When he’d asked her to go to the movies with him the next day, it seemed that both of them had been surprised when she’d said yes.  And the date.  That had been absolutely mortifying.  Her dad had dropped her off at the theatre giving her his cell phone telling her to call right away if she needed him and to kick below the belt if she needed to.  In addition he’d glared at Sam.  She wouldn’t have blamed him if he’d backed out, but he hadn’t.  Instead he’d awkwardly held the door for her, blushing when the older people around him, whispered how cute they were.  During the movie, when their hands had touched trying to get some popcorn, he’d been so surprised, he’d dropped the bucket. 

The date had been far from perfect but by the end of the night, both were a bit love struck. 

“I’ll try to come back,” Meadow said as her mind replayed their first date.  How young they had been, how innocent they were, how in love she’d been.