Looking to Lose (completed)

*4*

I'm humming as I skip into work this morning. I had a particularly satisfying daydream on the trolley ride here. That, plus the hot sun shining brilliantly, have put me in a wonderful mood. I even bought a bundle of sunflowers from a vendor on the street corner, figuring the shop could use a bit of sunshine too.

"Good morning Ros!" I sing loudly, twirling about with the sunflowers clutched to my chest, the skirt I'm wearing flaring around me. Someone should take a picture, I think. I look damn cute today. I fully embraced the sunny forecast when dressing this morning, pulling on a tea-length pleated pink skirt and tying my yellow Books & Co. tee in a little knot above my waist. I have one of these shirts in every color, but I felt like dressing like a bowl of citrus today. My long black hair is pulled out of my face with an old silk scarf and I even put on some peach-colored eyeshadow, my normally steel-grey eyes transforming into a deep shade of blue with the color contrast. The perfect outfit to fall in love.

"Good morning hon – oh! Those flowers are beautiful!" She says smiling, coming out from around the back.

"They're for you," I say cheerfully with a little curtsey and a laugh. "I'll go grab a vase to put –"

Trailing behind Ros is a memorable mop of curly brown hair that makes my stomach drop. My gaze roams downwards and is met with narrowed hazel eyes. My smile instantly falls from my lips, flipping to a scowl instead.

"Oh, yes!" Ros cuts into our glaring competition. "This is our newest employee," she claps with the same cheer I had moments ago.

"But – but what about the application I printed out for you a few days ago? Aaron something? He sounded perfect!" I fight to keep the dreamy desperation out of my voice.

"This is Aaron silly," she replies, literally dragging him by the arm so he's standing in front of me. "He's a bit shy," she nudges him with a smile, as if they're already friends. Or he's just fighting the urge to say something rude, I think to myself.

"Oh really?" I say with a raised eyebrow and then stick out my hand. "It's absolutely wonderful to meet you Aaron," I say sweetly but I keep the venom in my eyes. I will be nice to this boy, I will be nice to this boy, I will be nice to this boy. More than anything, I'm mad I actually know his name now and can't keep calling him Mr. Forgot-to-Dislodge-the-Stick-from-My-Ass-Today.

He glares at my hand for a moment, and I can tell he really does not want to shake it. But Ros, his new boss, who he does have to impress, is standing right beside us, so I keep my hand aloft until he encloses it in a firm grip. A bit too firm. I ignore the tingle running up my arm, chalking it up to the fact that this is the first time a boy has even touched me in months. But he's not a really a boy, I remind myself, he's the devil. My previously sunny disposition dissipates when I realize that my workplace fantasies will not become a reality.

"I'm going to show Aaron around today, teach him our filing system and how to take inventory okay?" Ross asks and I nod my head, grateful she didn't task me with mentoring him. Though my gratitude quickly flashes to anger when she finishes with: "Tomorrow you can show him around the bar and how to ring up customers."

Is it possible to catch a deadly virus and die within 24 hours? Because I simply cannot come to work tomorrow. I cannot handle being berated all day. As has been previously discussed, my confidence just cannot handle the torment.

Hold on. This place has served as a second home to me for the past five years, and Ros has been like a mother. Am I going to let some lowlife, evil punk push me out of my rightful place? Hell no. If anything, I would get him to leave. Oh yes, that sounds lovely – make him run for the hills. Give him a taste of his own medicine.