Show Me

Ch 2

Jim didn't even know where to start.

Right now, he was sitting in the room next to the balcony, the glass revealing the harsh landscape in a beautiful light.

When Spock Prime cleared his throat, Jim's eyes flicked towards him without meaning to. Immediately he imagined Spock during mid-throes of passion. Cursing inwardly, Jim stifled the heat threatening to envelope his cheeks. Embarrassed by his thoughts, the Captain shifted his gaze down to the hot cup of tea in his hands.

"What is troubling you?" Spock Prime repeated, concern furrowing his brow.

"I'd... rather not say." Kirk said slowly, his thumb playing slowly with the handle of the cup.

When the Captain looked up, the Vulcan was looking at him with the most quizzical expression he had ever seen on any Vulcan's face. Feeling rather childish, Kirk found himself looking away once more. He had brought up the courage to come all this way, to risk the fury of his First Commander in taking this leave in the first place, and now he was going to proceed to act like a pre-pubescent teen about to reveal his first crush?

He barely heard the other move when he felt the couch dip next to him with the added weight. Startled, he almost dropped his cup when Spock Prime placed a hand on his arm, "Jim... ease your burden and tell me what worries you so."

Without looking at the other, Jim closed his eyes and exhaled deeply. Well, it was either now or never.

Placing the cup of tea on the low table before him, Kirk took a large sigh as though he were preparing to dive off a cliff, his hands wringing nervously on his jeans, "I... back in the cave when... uh, with the mind meld..."

At each string of words, before Jim would pause, he saw the furrow in Spock Prime's brow deepen.

Feeling like he would much rather stab his eye out with the dull end of a spoon, the Captain swallowed audibly. Might as well get it over with. Why only kill yourself halfway, after all?

Turning his eyes away, looking out the glass door at the arid landscape, Jim was suddenly reminded of his home back in Earth. It bolstered him enough to just spit out the beginning to his little confession, "And then I got all these images, you know, of you and the other Jim. It was weird, and I honestly feel bad about having seen 'em, you know? Because they all seemed kinda... private."

"Jim..." The way Spock Prime said his name had always been affectionate. But this time...

Kirk didn't know how he had the strength to tear away from the gaze. He sure as hell tried not to look at the Vulcan during his short little speech. However he had managed it, it seemed his courage seemed to be failing at the same pace his heart beat in his chest.

"Anyway, that's all I came here to say-"

"Jim."

"-and to say that I'm sorry." The Captain continued, as though the Vulcan hadn't said anything.

"Jim."

"And..." Kirk stood ramrod straight, doing an about face as he attempted to walk out of there, "...I should really just..." He found his words interrupted as a soft grip on his arm made him turn around. The Captain could feel the intense body heat of Spock Prime radiating behind him. When his blue eyes finally rose to meet those wizened brown, Jim could only finish lamely, "...go."

There was such a longing in Spock Prime's eyes. Jim realized now, going here to him in his home was not only placing Jim's feelings on the line, but Spock Prime's as well. The older Spock was isolated in this time stream, torn from his own Jim. And here Jim was, trying to pour his confused heart out about his own Spock, and...

If the Captain thought he was stiff before, it was nothing at all compared to how he was now. He felt as though he were stiff as a board, unbelieving.

The older Vulcan was... kissing him.

Hands, wizened yet still strong, ghosted across his skin, trailing heat wherever they went. Jim couldn't help but gasp at the skill, his open mouth left vulnerable to Spock Prime, who took advantage of the breach to stroke within the Captain's moist depths.

Just as Jim began forcing his mind to work, Spock Prime pulled back. As if sensing the other needed time, and space, the Vulcan stepped away from the other as well, though his hands remained on Jim's shoulders.

"Is that what you felt, Jim?"

"I..." What else could he say? "...Yeah, that was... yeah that was it, actually..."

Jim, confused now more than ever, wasn't sure whether to look the older Vulcan in the eye or not.

"Jim..." Spock Prime said softly, urging the other to look at him. When their gazes met, the older Vulcan stated, "This is not something you should be ashamed of. If anyone should be feeling ashamed, it should be I. To have forced such feelings on you-"

"You didn't." Jim said in a rush, interrupting the older male. Realizing he had cut off the Vulcan mid-sentence, Jim closed his mouth sheepishly, before continuing his explanation at a slower pace, "You didn't force those feelings, Spock Prime. I think... I'm pretty sure I had them all along. But now... I..."

"You don't know what you should do." The Vulcan finished the sentence for him, his eyebrow quirked as he gave a sad smile.

Jim laughed. At the insanity of it all. About him and Spock's alternate reality version of himself. At how weird it was that Spock Prime always knew exactly what he wanted. What he needed...

"You always know what to say..." Jim stated, running a hand through his hair, "I... on the other hand, have a tendency to screw up everything around me. I feel like such an idiot! Here I am, trying to get your help, but I'm just hurting you too, aren't I? I'm such a fucking moron!"

Spock Prime allowed the rant to go on, before asking, "What do you require of me, Jim? What did you come here for?"

"I..." Jim swallowed. Hard. What did he come here for? Was it just to confess his feelings over someone who could never love him back? Or was it for something more...?

The air seemed to tense around them. The Captain wasn't sure if he was breathing. But Spock Prime's face seemed to be closer than before. Would he mind if they kissed once again? Maybe it wouldn't be his own Spock, but it was better than nothing. Right? Except he couldn't.

He couldn't hurt Spock Prime like that.

The older Vulcan was hurting just as bad. Worse, even. He had decades to experience the love Jim could only glance at.

"No... we shouldn't..." Jim breathed, surprised at just how close his lips were to the other's.

"If he cannot see a good thing before him... then he is a fool." Spock Prime said deeply, for once the Captain catching a hint of anger in the tones.

"What?" The Captain asked, feeling a rising urgency filling the other. His breath hitched as the Vulcan tightened his hold, almost crushing Jim to his lean, yet muscled form.

"If he does not claim you as his mate..." Spock Prime growled, "...I *will*."

A myriad of emotions welled up in the Captain. The foremost was the feeling of being wanted. Needed. Desired. It all spiraled to coil within Jim, a heat spreading throughout his skin that left him lightheaded. Those brown eyes, so similar... yet so much kinder.

"...I..." Kirk found his voice as unsure as the thoughts that swirled inside. He couldn't help but be pulled closer to the heat that radiated from the Vulcan before him.

Their lips were so close.

Suddenly there was a harsh knock at the door. The two jerked back even before the voice of Spock drifted through, "Spock Prime, I wish to speak with you..."