His Girl

Goodnight

I got into bed, my sweatpants wadded up on the floor. I lay on my back wondering how things had gotten so complicated. I saw how agitated Breaker got about his family issues, I was terrified that side of him and the side mom knew (the side that seemed to fall from heaven) would collide in front her and Bill and half the news media.

I took my journal out of the drawer and began lamenting. Why did it have to be so hard?

I was surprised to hear a tap on my window. He'd left, I watched him drive away. I opened the curtain. My heart raced, I threw my journal back into hiding.

I was too happy to see him to be upset about how nervous it made me.

"Oh my gosh," I said as I opened the window.

"Is she asleep?"

"Yeah." I tiptoed to the hallway, I could hear snoring from there. I confirmed with him.

"Come out."

"Out?"

"Get dressed, come on. The rain stopped." He grabbed the back of my neck and kissed me hard. Memories of our night together tingled inside.

"Where?" I was slipping jeans and a sweater on.

I closed the window behind us, he helped me as we scaled the embankment of ground cover down to the walking path. We ran to his truck.

Inside, he grabbed me and kissed me. He stopped and said a swear word in delight before diving in for another.

"What's up with you?" I asked as we drove west toward the beach.

We parked on a residential street and walked to the sand, out of street view. He carried a bag filled with a blanket, two drinks and a chocolate bar. He spread it out picnic style and we sat down.

"I'm sorry I was not the best at school. I was just, I don't know."

"You had a lot going on," I said.

"Not your fault."

"It's not about fault. If you're dealing with something, then so am I."

"It's like that, huh?" He was on his side, his head propped up in his hand. I was sitting with my elbows on my knees. He pulled me to lay with him.

"Yes, it's like that." I was in his arms.

"Then it's the same for you. Whatever you're dealing with, so am I."

"Like, dealing with my mom?" I giggled. I was still uncomfortable about outreach day. My mom just had too much riding on our backs.

"Your mom is cool."

"I want to meet your mom."

"Someday," he shrugged.

I was completely smashed against him, our legs intertwined. He snagged another blanket from the beach bag. A lighter one that he sprawled over us.

"You hear the waves?" he asked. I nodded and we both watched the ocean in the moonlight. "Makes me feel like I could just float away."

"Not without me."

"What are you going to do floating out there deep in the water?" His tone and his words made me shake inside.

"Be with you," my voice was cracking, I hadn't anticipated feeling emotional.

"What's wrong?"

"Everything is just so hard and I don't know what's going to happen." I was hiding my tears on his shirt.

"What are you afraid of?"

"Losing you." I grabbed onto him harder.

"Why would you think that?"

"Camila lost you." I held my breath.

"You're not her." There was a dismissive laugh under his words.

"What happened?"

"She's stupid."

"Just tell me." I was on my stomach, he was halfway under me.

"She never really liked me."

"I've had a few bruises that say otherwise."

"Sorry." He held my face and kissed my forehead. "She just wants status. As soon as I wasn't around, she was all over the next guy and when someone she thought was more important came around, she jumped to that guy. And she lied to me about it. While I was away for a year, she'd write me and talk to me and then I'd hear from whoever. She's not a nice girl like you."

"She's back on you now though."

"Yeah because I'm the big dog, everyone wants me." He flipped us so he was on top. I was giggling. "I don't trust girls, but you're different. If I went away for a year, I think you'd wait."

"I'd wait longer." My hips moved underneath him.

"How long?"

"Forever." Everything stopped for a moment. Our eyes were locked in a serious stare.

"I love that you're all mine. I'll never share you, ever." His tongue was soft on my earlobe, his teeth a little harder. He nibbled and bit until my nerves went insane. Every inch of my body was responding to him.

His head disappeared under the blanket, I felt my shirt moving. His lips kissed me softly, his fingers followed, touching the places he'd wetted with his tongue. I felt the button on my pants release, his hands were warm on my skin.

"Can you again?" he whispered. I was moaning incoherently. "It doesn't hurt anymore, does it?"

"It feels good." His face intent on me with the night sky and crashing waves behind him was overwhelming. I screamed, grabbing handfuls of his back, his sides, his hair.

"Tell me," he groaned in a low scratchy voice.

"Something's happening." I was losing control of my body. There was a build up of pressure I'd never experienced. "It's happening." I screamed, my back arched. For a moment, my limbs stretched and flexed involuntarily. High pitched cries panted out of me as it released.

"Oh Chanel, baby." I felt him move and stiffen for a moment, then he laid on top of me. I was limp and lifeless.

He drove me home but I didn't want to get out of his truck.

"I need you all night," I told him.

"Come on, I'll take you inside."

He helped me into my window.

"Stay," I begged. I was holding onto his shirt. "Please."

"Okay, just a little." He put me into bed and held me. "Seeing you like that was so hot."

"It felt good." I hid my face.

"I like watching you open up."

I smiled and rested on him until he insisted he had to leave because the sun was rising.