Im Crazy For You ( Book 1 )

1

They Hurt me

They abuse me

They rape me

They treat me like I'm their sex slave..

Then again, It's what I am to Them

They claim me

They scare me

I Hate them

I don't know their feelings toward me..

But I don't care ! Either way I hate them for what their doing to me !

And I can't do anything about it

I'm weaker..

Smaller..

Worthless..

Retarded

Annoying

Hard Headed

Stubborn

Stupid

Soft

Only the little things they call me..

Also, 2 of them know my secret, The big one. They use it against me all the time, I don't, refuse, and can't let anybody know about my secret. Then I'll be the most judged one in the whole school. Then again, Everything that they will call me, is true..

I Hate them with passion..

Each.And.Every.Single.One.

You probably don't know who I'm talking about do you ? I'm talking about the fucktards of my life..

Rayan, Chresanto, Craig, And .....Ugh...Jacob

But they go by Ray Ray, Roc, Prodigy, And ........UGH Princeton..

I Hate them all, The only one I don't hate, AS MUCH, Is Prodigy, He doesn't really abuse me as much as the rest of them do. However he could of done something to stop this crap !

When I first saw them I thought they were cute, Until I saw their true colors, which disgust me

Do they ever feel Bad for themselves ? For me ? Does GUILT even exist in those boys ! UGH Damn the violent things I wish I can do to them !

No one knows about me being their little sex slave, or the person they hurt and bully, Yupp they bully me too, But they try not to make it obvious in school, I mean how would boys look bullying girls ? That's not cool, so they keep it on the down low..Dickwatts...I don't see why they choose me ? The fuck did I do ? I'm just minding my own business, In the hallway going to my locker, all alone, in the middle of the school day, Next thing you know, I'm in bed with all 4 of those hoes ! I got kidnapped, hit, slapped, and raped. Now this happens on a regular basis..

Oops. I'm sorry, I forgot to introduce myself...

I'm Maliina, Maliina Gibbs

I'm puerto rican and black. I live with my older brother Juniior, and little sister Cassiandra (Cassy-an-dra). I should be back in New York where my parents are But I chose for me and Cassi to move to L.A. with My brother. My parents were never home, and I got sick of it and left. My brother got sick of it too, so he left first, I think he moved to L.A. because he had people here, I don't how and I don't really care why.

Anyways, What I still don't understand... Why me ?

Prince used to be my best friend, That's one of the reasons I liked him , He opened up to me, And unfortunately.....I opened up to him , Therefore he knows my secret

I mean, I'm pretty..Right ? Yea I am, I'm very confident, until I met them..

I have alot of friends

I'm not an easy target, until now..

There's a WHOLE bunch of pretty girls in the school, Why me ?

What did I do for God to put me in this terrible position..

I just don't get it...I hate my life now !

I used to love it

Waking up to my adorable, sweet loving little sister shaking me saying "Sissy Sisssyyyy ! Wake up sissy ! Junii gonna get us food !" Or "Sissssyy ! I wanna go to the park, And I only want us to go !" or "I love you sissy, now wake up so we can play" or "Your so pretty when you sleep, hehe"

Now, sometimes I'm get woken up in another bed that's not mine, barely any clothes on by "Ayo Bitch ! Wake the fuck up, dang stop being lazy" "Waakkkeee upppp ! Niggas' don't got all day !" " Dang If you don't wake the fuck up man ..." Sometimes it would be perverted "Aye baby, you did good lastnight, bitches could of been sucked better but ehh, it was good" "Aye sexy, wake up so we can have round 3" Basically, No respect

Except for this one time..

I could of sworn I heard someone whisper "Liina you are beautiful, gorgeous, and everything I could want. I'm sorry I hurt you. I don't mean it, honestly. I love you. Soo much, you don't even know. One day I'm going to stop and MAKE SURE I stop. I love you beautiful"

But I DOUBT One of them little niggas would say that to me I bet it was all in my head, Like I said and will continue to say

"I Hate You.."

~Angel

*
Yea I hurt her

I rape her, to me it wouldn't be rape if she would just relax and Enjoy the fucking sex, dang

I "abuse" her

She's me and my boys' sex slave, you can say

She gets bruises

She gets hurt

Pushed around

Cursed out

Made fun off

Gets put down

Then again...

I Love Her..

Soo much

Before y'all niggas go judging me saying "Your cruel" "Your dumb" "You make no sense !"

Shut the fuck up..

I'm tired of my conscious telling me that shit.

The thing is, I used to get bullied..

She reminds me of someone who bullied me, In a way, Made fun of me all the time, Put me down, and just made my spirit weak

I don't care if it's not her ! Actually she used to be my bestfriend, It's just I saw her do something really mean one day, It brought me back to my childhood, and I don't know, I turned against her..

She's sexy so I'm happy to have sex with her though. And when she doesn't comprehend...I use he secret against her threating to let it out..

Abuse ?......I don't know....I'm stupid for actually hitting her and stuff, I regret it all the time..Every day actually..

And I always pray to god that she forgives me for my actions and hopefully one day..I'll admit to her how sorry I am and hopefully she forgives me and loves me as much as I love her..

Angel

"I'm Sorry I Hurt You.."
-Princeton