Running On Caffeine: An Attys Anthology (Attys 2012)

Lyric: When It Rains

As I look out the window, I watch the rain,

I remember everything you said,

You said you would never leave me, you promised to never forget,

You lied to me,

Because all it took was just a few days,

I told you everything, I never held anything back,

I thought this time it would be different, but you proved me wrong,

I've always warned my friends that I never give my all,

I never give my everything into a friendship because I fear it might cause me to fall,

It sounds selfish, I know it does,

But its something I can't help,

I've been hurt way too many times before,

And with you, the same story has been told,

You took me, and held me through many storms,

I told you my deepest thoughts, and my many concerns,

You took them all, and held me together in one place,

I give myself up like a puzzle,

But I always hold on to a piece,

I'm unpredictable, misunderstood, an unsolved mystery,

I've never made it easy,

Easy for anyone to find out what I'm all about,

Many will never know me completely,

I'm human, but I refuse to show my weaknesses,

It's not a pride thing, it's about control,

Controlling how much about me people will know,

You knew I have problems with people leaving me,

I really wish you could understand what you're doing to me,

Because when I finally decided to give you my everthing, I gave you my all,

It was stupid of me, to let my guard down like that,

I can't believe I almost told you something, something that literally no one will ever find out,

I let you in into my crazy world, and you left me lonelier than before,

It's raining, and the sky is grey,

And that's just how I feel, not exactly great,

I feel like a cloud, as every raindrop falls,

I'm becoming transparent, empty and lost,

To think that everything I said meant absolutely nothing to you,

I'm not gonna lie, but it's slowly tearing me apart,

I was already standing on a cracked foundation when you came to save the day,

I felt like things were finally starting to make sense,

I felt like I had someone who I could lean on when you were by my side,

You made me feel like the most amazing person in the world, like I was greater than I really am,

But all of those lies have come back to slap me in the face,

Never will I ever allow anyone or myself to bring down my walls,

Or let anyone convince me that it's not good to keep all my feelings in,

Because that's how everything starts,

"Oh, everything is gonna be fine!"

"Don't worry, I will always be here for you no matter what"

Lies, they're all lies,

The unknown, that's what I like to be,

So I beg you to please leave me alone, and I'll take care of me