How Not To Fall In Love

How Not To Fall In Love~ Two

     “I knew you were trouble when you walked in.”

                                                   —I Knew You Were Trouble, Taylor Swift

     Two

     “You’re really pathetic, you know that?” 

     I resisted the urge to curl my lip, and instead coughed in her direction, wiping at the fake sweat on my forehead.  “I’m not lying, Sam.  I really am—” I coughed again for good measure.  “I really am sick.”    

     She didn’t look convinced.  “And how convenient that you chose to get sick today.”

     She pulled back the blankets revealing the hot wet towels I used to give myself a fever.  I stared up at her with wide eyes, her face deadpanned.  “Uh...I can explain.”

     In two seconds, Sam had dragged me out of the bed and onto my feet.  “Seriously?  Is this the Alexa I know?  Quaking in fear beneath the blankets?”

      I jutted out my bottom lip.  “Oh, come on.  Give me a break.  You know if I cross paths with him, I’m dead.”

     “So do you plan to avoid him for the next three and a half years?”

     “Well, yeah, that was sort of the idea.”

     She hooked her middle and thumb finger together, flicking me hard on the forehead.  “Nathan is here, whether you like it or not.  And sitting up here hiding from him is going to do absolutely nothing.  Not like you have anything to be afraid of in the first place.  So you might as well get up, put on your big girl pants, face this guy, and apologize.”

     I held up my hands.  “Whoa, let’s not go that far.  I don’t do apologies.”

     Sam started to flick me again, but I blocked my face.  She was majoring in Criminal Psychology.  A smart choice, I had come to realize.  She may not necessarily look the part, with her scruffy oversized t-shirts and baseball caps, but she knew what made each person tick.  And for me, she knew a little physical violence, especially coming from her, was enough to push me over the edge. 

     “Okay, okay, fine.  I’ll leave the dorm.”  I said, but she didn’t lower her hand.

     “And?”

     “And...what?”

     “And you’re going to go apologize to him.”  She said, and I sighed.  Asking me to put myself in a situation that could practically ruin me was doable.  But asking me to relinquish my pride?  Impossible.

     “Why?  It’s been like twenty billion years since I did anything to him.”  I said.

     “You tortured that boy throughout elementary and middle school.  In fifth grade, I discreetly remember you attaching him by his underwear to a tree branch, and using him as a live piñata.  No wonder he hates you.  I would hate you too.  So you’re going to run around here like a dog with his tail between his legs, when all it might take to settle this is a simple apology.”  Sam placed her hand on her hip.  “I’m not going to watch you confine yourself in a room just because of your stupid pride.”

     I wasn’t going to win this.  That was obvious.  So to keep her off my case, I told her what she wanted to hear.  “Fine, I’ll apologize when I see him.”

     “Promise?”

     “Promise.”

      Keeping that promise wasn’t too hard.  I had watched enough law television dramas to know that every promise has a loophole.  I didn’t plan on apologizing.  So the loophole out of that would be to not see him.