Autumn Leaves (HIATUS)

Prologue

She reached out to me with small hands, her fingers tangled in my beard. I looked down at her, tears sparkling in my eyes. "My beautiful baby girl." I whispered, my voice catching as I spoke. I leant down towards her, resting my forehead against hers. Her giggle was like music to my hears.

I returned my attention to her mother. Her delicate face was illuminated by a radiant smile, one that managed to awaken her tired eyes. "What should we call her?" she asked, softly. Looking to my right, I had the perfect view over the town of Dale and beyond. The leaves on the trees of Mirkwood were golden, shining with morning dew. The morning air was cool and refreshing upon my skin. Pure bliss.

"Autumn."

Everything seemed to have fallen into place. I was happy; I had a daughter and the company of the most stunning Elven maiden to walk Middle-Earth. But my heart broke, knowing what I must do. I crossed the room, Autumn still clutched to my chest. I could feel her strong heartbeat against me. Carefully, I lowered myself onto the end of the bed. I took a deep breath, "I'm sorry, Fizzy." I said, casting her a quick glance. Confusion was written all over her face. I continued, "No one can know. You understand that, right? We are not married and no one would accept our child knowing her parentage." A heavy silence consumed the room as the words left my mouth. I was unable to look at Fizzy, but I feel her eyes trained on me. "I will not abandon you. I will continue to supply you both. You are a resident of Erebor; King Thror has accepted you into his Kingdom. But no one can know." I was sobbing now.

Passing Autumn, who was staring at me through the big blue eyes that I recognised as my own, to her mother, I stood up and left the room.

***

4 Years Later

"Thorin!" My name echoed around the halls of Erebor. I turned to see a young girl sprinting towards me. Her ebony hair flew behind her, her blue eyes shining with glee. When she got close enough, she jumped. Without missing a beat I caught her small form in my arms, spinning her around.

"Hello, Autumn." I chuckled. She grinned at me, some strands of hair covering her face. Gently, I brushed them behind her ear.

"This is for you." she anounced. In her hand she held a small doll. It wore a blue tunic and brown trousers, its hair fell to its shoulders and it had beard, that was secured with one plait. "It's you!"

"Wow. I love it, thank you, Autumn. Did you make it yourself?" a genuine smile playing on my lips.

She nodded her head vigourously, but then a frown creased her brow, "Mummy helped a bit." she said, apparently embarrassed. She bowed her head, avoiding my gazed. I hooked my finger under her jaw and lifted her face to mine.

"It's beautiful, nonetheless." she broke into a grin, throwing her arms around my neck, "Now, Thorin has some things he needs to do. Why don't you go and find Mummy and I'll visit you later." Once again, she nodded energetically. I placed her on her feet and she ran back the way she had come. It was with a heavy heart that I watched her.

***

I threw myself to the floor, rolling to the side to avoid the dagger like claws. When they had passed, I pushed myself to my feet and looked after the beast. The destruction that it had left behind was soul-shattering. I began to help the living to their feet, ushering them through the front gate. But I could not follow. Not yet. I turned on my heel and ran towards Fizzy's chambers.

It wasn't long before I reached the room. Desperation overwhelming me, I banged on the door. No answer. I knocked again, but still got no response. Panicking, I threw myself against the door. It opened under my weight and I stumbled inside.

The room was empty.

I searched the room, my eyes darting from corner to corner. I flung the door to the bathroom open, but there was no one in there, either. Returning to the main room, I slumped on the bed, my hands tangled in my hair. Grief began to burn inside me.

They cannot be dead. The dragon has not passed this way and the door was locked from the inside. They must have fled.

Raising my head, I scanned the room one last time. Thinking that it was empty, I rose to my feet and approached the doorway. But something caught my eye. On the dressing table there was a small slip of parchment. It had been torn in a hurry, judging by the edges. On it were seven words.

I couldn't take it. We are safe.

Despair and relief rushed through me. My girls were safe... but I had hurt them. They had left because of my actions. I would not see them again.

Folding the note up, I slipped it into my pocket and left the room. I could not abandon my kin, they needed my help. I ran throigh the ruined halls of Erebor, picking up the wounded along the way.

Days later, we reached safety. I cared for the wounded and found work in the neighbouring towns of men. I did all that I could to help my people, forcing the memories of Autumn and Fizzy from my mind. I would not see them again, there was no point in remembering...