Silently Screaming

Chapter One (part one)

**Cover Photo: © Luba V Nel | Dreamstime.com photograph: Blond Girl 7)**

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SILENTLY SCREAMING

CHAPTER ONE (part one)

Nikki grabbed an unlucky frog hopping along the dirt’s edge before walking through the front door of her home. She held the rough creature in her hands and saw how dirty her nails were just beneath the surface. When she opened the door, she faced an image unsurprising and expected to say the least. The floral printed couch ripped on all ends, held the lifeless bodies of her mom and her mom’s so-called friends; the people Ms. Moore hung with on a daily basis were addicts just like herself, unlike Nikki. Nikki squinted and used the little amount of light available to help guide her path as she carefully stepped over a random needle laying on the ground. The house was quiet and tasted of old rust, another smell that Nikki took little notice of nowadays. Nevertheless she found it difficult to breathe due to a lack of fresh air from the closed windows. As she passed the couch, she noticed her mom readjusting her body and neck until she fell over onto her side. Nikki immediately slouched over and kept her head down while stepping quietly over scattered piles of clothes. She dreaded making eye contact with her mom, if in deed her eyes actually opened, because it would start an unnecessary argument inevitably leading nowhere. Then she finally reached the kitchen and tossed a to-go box, from the Diner she worked at, into the refrigerator and immediately tip toed straight down the hall to her room.

She reached the bedroom door and opened her bag pulling out the keys to the locks in front of her. Nikki glanced behind herself before unlocking them and quickly shut the door, locking all three fast. One lock was shinier than the rest from being installed the week before after some money went missing.  

Afterwards, she placed her tiny croaking guest in with the others in a large old shoebox. Centerville’s weather was much colder this year in Texas, making it harder to find little creatures outside, forcing Nikki to collect a few extra whenever possible. Her watch beeped for the eleventh hour and then she tossed one of the older frogs into the cage for Fang, her neon green Mamba snake. She breathed in heavily and said a quick goodbye to the poor fellow before it was goner, and then fell backwards with full force onto her bed. Her hands patted different spots above until she found her pillow and stuffed it under her neck. There weren’t any sheets on her bed, instead in its place laid a sprawled open sleeping bag covering up the decade old stained mattress, and while lying there, a roach crawled across her arm. Nikki grimaced and flicked the insect off. It wasn’t even like there was a landlord for her to call; the house was bought with some money that her mom received when her great-grandma died years back, when she was in elementary school.

Nikki laid there and wrinkled her face as the stench of fried food traveled up a path directly to her nose. Even though it was hard to smell anything over the permanent smoke odor in the house, Nikki’s work clothes had been worn a few times over waitressing as many hours as possible during the winter break, the aroma was quite strong. Most nights Nikki sprayed Febreeze on her clothes and hung them back in her closet, and most of the time they smelled somewhat better, but eventually she had to take a load to the local laundry mat. Tonight was going to be another one of those air-out in her closet nights.

She stood up, took off her clothes and replaced them with some baggy brown pants from the bottom dresser drawer and grabbed an old shirt draped over a chair.  Then she propped her head up and spotted the green Mamba snake curled up in the corner of its cage. She was never one to find snakes interesting, and if you had told her a year ago that she’d own one, she would’ve thought you were crazy. But when Old Mr. Popeye, the nickname Caroline gave him, died last fall, Nikki saw his family piling everything up outside his home. He was a collector of snakes, actually it was more of an obsession, and Nikki walked over to see if she could help move boxes and such. That’s when she spotted the green creature in its cage, and his brother graciously gave it to her for free, without hesitation. He told her what to feed it, and to be careful because it was terribly deadly. One bite would kill a person if medical treatment wasn’t administered immediately. A tad intimidated but also fascinated at the same time, she took it, hoping the presence of it would deter any unwanted guests in her room.

The glass cage it was in was secured by a lock and there were two compartments within the cage allowing Nikki to feed him while it was curled up in the opposite compartment she opened.

She grabbed her bag from the side floor of the bed and unzipped it. A smile came to her face when she pulled out the tips from that night and began counting

One

Two

Three

Eight

Fifteen

Eighteen

and… fifty-two cents.

While she counted a few more dollars, her mind got lost in a daydream about her future apartment she was saving for, the one she was going to share with Caroline.  Then a picture of a crying baby crept into her dream and she quickly shook the image from her mind. Caroline’s situation definitely had put a damper in their future plans, but it didn’t change anything. They were still moving in together, and Nikki was able to breathe easier when she thought of this.

A loud thud hit on the other side of her door and immediately, she knew exactly who it was.

Nikki sighed, “Yes mom?” The question spit from her lips as she winced at the possibilities as to what her mom could possibly want this time.

“What are you doing in there? Do you think that you can just tromp through here like a whore, and not say a word to me and that I would be fine with it?” Her mom slurred her words and the sound of her voice faded in and out as she spoke.

“What do you want mom?” Nikki was not amused and it clearly showed through her words. Not only did she know her mom could care less about what she was doing at that very moment, or at any other moment, but she also knew that if her mom were talking to her then that meant she wanted something and she wasn’t going to leave her alone until Nikki gave it to her.

“Don’t you dare talk to me like that.  I am your mom and you WILL show me some respect, do you understand me little girl!” Nikki’s mom could be overly dramatic at times, and all Nikki wanted to do was give her exactly what she wanted so that she would leave her alone and go away.

“I’m sorry. How-can-I-help-you?” This time her words were a little more pleasant sounding with a softer tone.

“That’s more like it. I need twenty dollars for the bills. The check this month wasn’t enough to cover them, and this place isn’t free. You can’t expect me to do everything!”

Money? Nikki should’ve guessed it. When is it not about money? And what bills was she talking about? The water had been turned off months ago and surely the government was giving her enough for electricity and food, well maybe not food, but the lights still worked didn’t they?

Nikki rolled off the bed over to her closet and then pushed aside the small amount of clothes that were hanging, revealing a grape colored metal lock box she hid on the shelf behind them. She placed it on her bed, unlocked it, and pulled out a twenty dollar bill and then shoved it underneath the door. Once the money disappeared, the voice from the other side vanished as well.

“Great, finally some peace,” she thought out loud.

Nikki added that night’s tips in the lock box on top of a passport and photo, then she placed it back securely in its hiding spot and rolled into bed and started typing on her phone. She was supposed to visit Caroline that night, but she was way too exhausted.

Hey wassup Car. Sorry I didn’t texted sooner, but I got held up at work. That efedup girl I was telling you about didn’t show up so I had more tables and I can barely feel my feet and my mom and I just got into it for the fiftymillionth time and I swear, she gets on my last nerve, and now we’re twenty dollars further away from our apartment L

She sat there and stared at the wallpaper peeling off the bedroom walls and waited for a reply. She felt bad for not visiting Caroline; she knew they had been planning on meeting up all day, especially since tomorrow was the first day of school. But she had no idea how crazy it was going to be at work that night. And now all she wanted to do was put on some headphones, turn off the lights and fall asleep listening to her music. Music that others found a little out of the ordinary, but that she found calming.