Peace of Mind

V

"John.  John!"  My head snapped up from my dining room table.   "Wha- what's going on?" 

I blinked slowly, trying to focus on something, but it was a good minute before my mom's face swam into view.  For a minute, I swore I saw Alex standing behind her, the way he would have just a few months ago, but then I blinked and he was gone.  

"You fell asleep doing your homework last night," my mom said, putting a hand on my shoulder.  "I didn't realize, or I would've gotten you up sooner."

I shrugged lazily, about to lay my head back on the table, when I suddenly remembered- Mr. Washington's meeting!

My head snapped around fast enough to cause a sharp pain in my neck.  I rubbed it as I glanced at the clock.  7:30- shit.  School started in fifteen minutes, and my meeting was scheduled for first thing in the morning.  I shot to my feet, looking around frantically.  

"Your dad took the car," my mom said quietly, as though she was afraid I'd be mad.  I just shook my head and gave my mom a quick hug.  I hope no one was paying attention to what I wore yesterday, I thought as I raced out the front door.  

Glancing at my watch, I gave myself about six minutes to cover the mile walk to school.  Groaning, I started jogging, hoping to make it in time for the meeting, if not the first bell. 

 No such luck.

As I jogged up to the school building, I caught a glimpse of one of the windows- class was already in session.  Panting, I leaned up against the school building, pulling my hair back into a messy ponytail before I walked up to the front doors.  

I bounced from foot to foot as I waited for the secretaries to unlock the door, looking right into the camera.  I tried to make out my reflection in the small black circle, trying to decide if I looked decent enough to pass as normal.  I was midway through tucking in my flyaway hairs when the lock on the door clicked.

I let myself in, walking into the office.  I'd already prepared exactly what I was going to say- "I'm sorry ma'am, my father took the car- no, ma'am, we don't have another.  Yes, ma'am, my mother was busy"- but he didn't get the chance.  

"Mr. Laurens."  Washington was standing right inside the office, glaring sternly down at me.  It suddenly hit me how absolutely terrifying he could be.  

Not willing to risk speaking, I nodded a greeting to him.  He coughed, and I looked up at him.  "Trying to skip our meeting?"

Skip the meeting?  Why would I- oh.  The realization suddenly hit me as I saw Thomas Jefferson peeking out of Washington's office.  Right.  But I still wasn't willing to lie to Washington, even if that would've made an easier explanation.  "No- no, sir," I replied, internally scolding myself for the stammer.  It's Washington, he reminded himself.  Just Washington.  "No, sir," I repeated, straightening my spine.  "My father had to take the car today and I fell asleep at the table last night and my mom-"

"It's fine," Washington suddenly interrupted, his face now wearing an expression of sympathy rather than sternness.  I saw him look me up and down and did my best to hide the outfit that was the exact same as yesterday's.  It wasn't the first time this had happened, but I was still embarrassed every time.  "Are you ready for the meeting then?"

On the inside, I was protesting, dragging my feet, kicking and screaming to be let go, to not be put in the room with that monster.  But on the outside, I was nodding, and my feet were walking, albeit slowly, toward Washington's office. 

When I walked in, Thomas was staring out the window, watching a pair of birds outside.  I eyed him suspiciously before glaring resolutely at the floor.  This was not something I was doing willingly, and I had every intention of making it as difficult as I could for Thomas. 

Mr. Washington cleared his throat.  "I'd ask the two of you to introduce yourselves," he began.  "But you both obviously know each other."  I could feel his eyes on me and I reluctantly looked up at him.  

"Do you know why I put the two of you in here together?"

To be a jackass, I thought to myself.  "To teach a lesson?"  

"Yes and no," Washington replied.  "Any other guesses?"

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Thomas's curls bounce as he shook his head. 

"It's because you're going through similar things," Washington informed us gently.  "Both of you have lost someone special recently."

I flinched back into the plastic chair.  There's no way Thomas fucking Jefferson could feel anything like this.  No way.

Mr. Washington leaned forward.  "Due to the nature of the loss, we already know who you lost, Mr. Laurens," Washington said, and I could tell he was choosing his words carefully, not just for my sake but for his own as well.  I tried not to let myself feel too sympathetic- not now, at least.  "Mr. Jefferson, would you mind telling John who it is that you lost?"

I tried not to look at him, but my curiosity got the better of me.  I risked a glance, and saw that Thomas looked smaller like this, less intimidating.  In fact, he looked almost scared as he answered Mr. Washington's question.

"My mother."

[a/n: ya girl is back in business! i know it's been... a month or so since i last updated, but people were showing interest in this and all of a sudden i was like- "omg i think i can write again!" so here i am.]