My FTM life

How I found out

I was always happy wearing whatever my mom put me in. That is of course, until the beginning of grade four. I started to find feminine clothing revolting, and begged my parents to buy me boy's clothing. In the beginning they refused, but after they realized if they didn't agree, I would have had no clothing to wear as I refused to have girly clothing even held against me to check for size. So that was that. I was a very curious (and smart even if I do say so myself) nine year old and I soon began looking up what it meant to want to be a boy. And so I found out the term transgender.

Fast forward one year and the feelings didn't go away. Even worse, I began developing breast tissue, and I began to experience the crippling dysphoria I still struggle with today. I did my best to hide it, and for a while it worked. I began referring to my self as dude, and bro, and begged my mom to let me cut my hair (spoilers she said no).

At the end of grade six, I told myself to stop playing these games and that I was never going to be a real boy anyway. So I started to dress femininely, yet I always had this voice in the back of my mind telling me that this was wrong, and I wasn't supposed to look like this.

Grade seven rolled around, and a fresh wave of dysphoria hit me in the face. I'm now doing my best to hide my chest with sports bras and acting more masculine than ever. I'm just taking it all one day at a time.

Signing out,

- Adam