Blood. Everywhere. Soaking the floor. Splatting the wall. Weeping. Screaming. Begging. I'm wet. I think its blood. The library is crowded. I don't know how many are still alive. Blood. The colorful media center has turned crimson. A shadow looms over me.
"Brad." I whimper.
"I hate you, Shane." the shadow says down to my cradled body. The voice is familiar, but not Brad's. The dark figure is wearing all black. A hood is over his head. The shadow slowly removed the veil of darkness. I stared up at myself. My hazel eyes, my dark and long brown hair. He, I, laughed. "This is your fault. Our fault. Now die!"
I awoke to the sound of my own scream. Tears streamed down my face. I looked at my alarm clock sitting on my night stand. 1:43. Too early to get up. I moaned and rolled over. I knew if I went back to sleep, the dreams would come back.
Nightmares plagued my slumber. The pain never faded. I haven't had a full night's sleep in months. I grabbed the remote off the floor and turned on the TV. Instantly, there was his face. Brad Peeples. My best friend. I cut the television off with a sigh. The school was always being featured on the news. I hated it. And now I was about to go back. It was October. Junior year was starting late. There was some rebuilding to do.
The first day of school. For some, its a joyous moment. But I don't think any student in the small town of Pair was happy to go back. We had one grocery store and one restaurant, Carter's Cafe. Everyone knew everyone, and no one was ever lonely. Except me.
I've walked to school everyday my entire life. You walk everywhere in Pair. I had a longer walk that first day back. After Dad left, we couldn't afford the two story house we lived in. I was hoping my mom would choose a place to live not in Pair, but no such luck. I was stuck in a small dingy-white trailer on the edge of town. Mom was never home. I never knew where she went because she lost her job. I hated it.
Instinctively, I stopped in front of Brad's house. We walked to school together everyday sophmore year. Then, with a pain in my heart, I remembered he wasn't coming. He never would. I looked at his house. It was trashed and ruined. His parents abandoned it after the shooting. I was sad to see the house with so many memories like that. But I walked on.
At school, I was greeted by the same school sign I'd seen for two years. But it was different. I was different. Years earlier, someone had spray-painted Des in front of the school name, Pair High School, so it was DesPair High School. But they recently covered the Des.
I looked to my right, to the courtyard everyone used to hang before school. It was empty. Flowers and crosses and other objects were scattered. Ten people died there. I got a chill down my spine.
A black stone stood under the shade of an oak tree. There were thirty four names were on it. Thirty four people who wouldn't be going back to school today. Thirty five, including Brad.
Reluctantly, I stepped inside the place that haunted my dreams. Instantly, I got malicious stares, from teachers and students alike. I didn't have to pass the newly built cafeteria to get to my first class. I did, however, have to go past the library where it all started. Flashbacks zoomed through my head.
Brad and I were in the library of Pair, doing a research paper on teh Colombine shooting.
"This is so horrible." I said. "What happened that day. How can anyone be capable of killing thirteen people?"
"Dude, these guys were amazing! They stood up for themselves." Brad replied. "They're my heroes, man."
I figured he was joking. "You wouldn't really do something like that, would you, Brad?"
He laughed. "No. Of course not."
