Head In The Stars

Chapter Twelve

"Well shit," Ray says. "What happened to the sweet, innocent girl I knew?"
I smile and shrug, realizing too late that he can't see me through the phone. "I don't know, Ray Ray."
He chuckles and I laugh, smiling like an idiot. Just the sound of Ray Carter's voice has me smiling uncontrollably.
"And nobody knows this?" He asks. "The whole story?"
"Nobody except for you, me and him," I reply.
I told Ray the whole story. Everything. About me and Dallas. About lying to my friends.
He listened patiently, trying not to laugh when I admitted to kissing Dallas multiple times. That's the thing I've missed the most about Ray. How good of a listener he is. How good of a friend he is.
I sit on the floor in my bedroom, talking to him and going through pictures of us. "What am I going to do?" I ask him.
"What are you going to do?" He repeats.
I sigh, picking up a picture of me with my arm thrown across Ray's shoulders and his arms wrapped around my waist. My head is thrown back as I laugh and Ray is smirking.
"Ray," I say. "I need your help. What am I going to do?"
"Avril," he replies seriously. "I am helping you. Now, what are you going to do?"
I smile gratefully. Too many times to count I would be sitting in this exact spot, asking what I was going to do and Ray would be standing above me asking me just what was I going to do.
"I don't think I know this time," I say. "I don't think there's anything to do."
"You say that all the time," he tells me.
"But this time I'm serious!" I protest. "There's nothing I can do."
"What don't you want to do?" Ray asks.
I answer without thinking. "Tell my friends."
"Then I think the solution is pretty simple," he says.
"What?" I question.
"You have to get him back. Steal him back from that bitch, Jenny."
I laugh at his high-pitched imitation of a girl. "Oh god, Ray. I've missed you."
"I've missed you too, Connor," he says and I picture his smile. All of his straight, perfectly white teeth, and the way the smile reaches his eyes. His green eyes matched with his wavy, caramel hair.
"Carter and Connor," I say, suddenly remembering our childhood nicknames.
"Best damn friends the world ever saw!" Ray exclaims.
I laugh, shaking my head. "How's the United States?"
"Oh," he says slowly. I perk up, listening closely. "You'd have to ask someone who lives there."
"Ray," I say in a warning tone. "What are you talking about?"
"I'm in Canada."
Those three words. I jump up and scream, dropping the phone. I hear Ray's laughter bubbling through the phone. He's losing it over there, laughing his ass off.
Hunter bursts through my door, shirtless and holding an umbrella like it's a weapon. He eyes the phone and then looks at me.
"Why the hell are you screaming?" He asks.
"Ray!" I yell excitedly.
"Ray Carter?" Hunter questions. I nod frantically, picking up the phone.
"Present," Ray says, his voice coming faintly from the phone. Hunter smiles and walks out of my room, shaking his head at my antics.
I press the phone to my ear. "God, he needs to learn how to put a shirt on," I say. "Where are you?"
"Staying at my grandparents right now," he tells me.
"The ones in Manitoba?" I ask.
"Yup," he replies. "And I'll be home after school ends."
"Home?" I ask slowly.
"Home, Avril," he tells me and I smile brightly. "But I need you to do something for me."
"What?" I ask. "I'll do anything."
"Before I come back, I want you to get Dallas back."
"What?" I exclaim. "That's insane!"
"Do it!"
"What about Friday and going to the party with Thomas?" I ask, hoping to get out of this.
"Screw Thomas. Great kid but not for you," Ray says.
"Okay, fine," I say with a sigh, giving in. "I'll do it."
"Deal?"
"Deal."
"Good girl," Ray tells me. "I have to go but I'll text you. Alright?"
"Alright," I reply. "Bye."
"Goodbye."
I hang up the phone and lay down on my floor, smiling like an idiot. I flip through more photos. There's one of us as kids in the swimming pool. Then, one of my favourites. It was taken right before Ray moved, at my parents' funeral. We're sitting in my backyard. I'm wearing my black dress and Ray is in a suit. He had pulled me into his lap as I cried on his shoulder. Teagan had taken the picture. I'm sitting in Ray's lap, tears gone, smiling at the camera while Ray is looking at me like I'm the most amazing thing he had ever seen.
Fourteen years old and already feeling like I was his everything.
I remember how upset I was when Ray told me he was moving. We were outside my house, nobody home but us. I had just stared at him blankly when he first told me. I couldn't believe it. I refused to believe it. I had just lost my parents, I couldn't lose him too. Then Ray told me that he liked, no loved, me. As I stood there, completely stunned, he pulled me towards him and kissed me.
My first kiss. His first kiss. Our goodbye kiss.
I lost contact with him after he moved. I still had and have always had his number committed to my memory but after that kiss I couldn't talk to him.
Today was the first time I've talked to him in two years. And there he was, my Ray. Ready to listen and help me. Ready to do whatever it took to make me happier. To make sure I wasn't so stressed.
And now he's coming home.
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"We're in trouble now," Charlie says, eyeing me as I sit down at our lunch table.
I smile at him, which scares him further. What can I say? I'm in a good mood. Even Dallas's rude comments in science about me and Thomas didn't affect me.
Miley looks at me confused. "What?" She asks.
"Avril?" Charlie asks.
Teagan looks at me curiously.
I bite my lip to keep from smiling but fail as my face breaks out into a huge grin. "I've got news," I tell them.
"What?" Teagan asks.
I smile at her. Teagan knew Ray the best besides me. Before Ray left, I only hung out with Charlie, Miley, and Teagan the odd time outside of school but Teagan occasionally hung out with Ray and I. After he left, I became extremely close with all of them, pushing Ray into a far corner in my mind and trying my best to forget.
"Well," I say.
"Oh my god!" Charlie exclaims impatiently. "What?"
"Avril," Teagan says. "Tell us."
"Ray is coming home!" I yell before I can stop myself.
Miley smiles enthusiastically at me. "That's great, Avril."
"Ray?" Teagan asks and smiles. "Ray Carter?"
I nod excitedly. "Yes! Ray is coming home. Coming here! He's coming back!" I exclaim.
"Great," Charlie mutters. I look at him, slightly annoyed by how sarcastic he sounds.
"What?" I demand.
"Nothing," he replies flatly. "I'm so glad that your little Ray Ray is coming home."
I bite my lip. I don't like when people mock me for calling Ray that. "What does that mean?" I ask quietly.
"What do you think it means, Avril?" Charlie asks me. I avoid his sharp look.
All three of my friends know about what happened with Ray and I. But that's not what is bothering Charlie. I remember Charlie asking me once what I thought would happen if Ray moved back or had never left. He wanted to know if we would still be close friends. I couldn't answer him.
"Charlie," I say. "Don't think like that."
"Think like what?" Miley asks.
"But what now, Avril?" Charlie demands. "What are you going to do now that your precious Ray Ray has come back?"
"Stop calling him that," I mumble, ignoring his question.
"What are you talking about, Charlie?" Teagan asks.
"Our friendship!" He snaps.
"What?" Miley asks, looking back and forth between all of us.
"Nothing is going to change," I say.
"That's a lie," Charlie sneers. "You're lying."
I look down at the impact of his words, ashamed. I am lying. About everything.
"Avril?" Teagan asks.
I look up at Miley, who is watching me with concerned eyes. She always seems to know so much. I wonder if she knows how much I've fucked up everything.
"I can't believe you," Charlie says. "You can't even deny it."
I just avert my gaze so that I'm looking at him. I silently plead for him to stop.
"Pathetic," he hisses and walks away from the table.
I watch him until he disappears inside. Then I realize what's happening and jump up to run after him. I faintly hear Teagan shout but miss what she says.
I turn a corner and run into something hard. I jump back and look up into Thomas's hazel eyes. Damn.
"Avril?" He asks, his eyes searching mine. "Are you alright?"
I melt a little at how concerned he is. "I'm fine, Thomas. Just looking for Charlie."
"Oh, I see," he says. "I think he went towards his locker."
"Thanks," I reply.
"No problem," Thomas says with a smile. "I'll see ya around? Let you get back to finding your friend."
"Okay," I say. "Sure. Bye."
He smiles and walks past me, heading outside.
"Wait!" I call out and he turns around. "Actually Thomas, I wanted to talk to you."
"Oh," he says, sounding slightly nervous.
"Don't worry," I say quickly. "It's nothing bad."
"Okay," he says with a laugh.
"I was just wondering if you wanted to come with me to Jenny's party?" I ask him. He looks at me curiously for a second. "What?" I exclaim nervously.
"Nothing," he says with a shake of his head. "Just usually the guy asks the girl. But, yes. Of course I'll go."
I smile and sigh with relief. "Okay, I'll pick you up Friday night then?"
"This is all so weird and opposite but sure," Thomas says with a prize-winning smile.
I smirk. "Hey, don't be sexist!" I say, pretending to scold him.
He laughs. "See you around, Avril."
"Don't spend too much time on your makeup for Friday," I tease him before walking away. "I don't want to be late."
I hear his laughter bouncing off the walls as I walk down the hall, and smile to myself. Thomas is a great guy. Perfect, even. He's the kid who, if we had a student body president, would win. He's smart, athletic, witty and good looking. He knows how to take and make a joke. He's just good.
I pick up the pace and make it to my locker just as Charlie slams his shut. "Hey," I say quietly.
The death glare Charlie was giving his locker is now trained on me. I feel like one of those spies in the movies. Ya know, when they have that little red laser beam locked on them? But I don't know if I'll be lucky enough to make it out alive.
"Charlie," I start. "Just listen."
"No," he snaps. "You listen."
I gulp and nod. "Alright," I say.
"Avril, I don't want to lose you. I realize that you have other friends but think about it. If Ray never left, you never would have been as close with us as you are. And now that he's coming back, you'll be pulled into him again. You won't hang out with us as much. All we'll hear about will be Ray this and Ray that. You'll be with him not us. And I don't even want to think about it after the way you guys left things. You'll probably get together and then we'll be nothing to you. Nothing," he says. "Avril, I don't want to be nothing."
I stare at him and shake my head. "No," I whisper before stepping closer and pulling him in for a hug. "No way, Charlie. You bitches will never be nothing. Not to me or the rest of the world. Especially you. Trust me, you won't ever be nothing."
"Avril," he says. "I'm sorry."
"Don't be sorry," I tell him. "Ever. I'm sorry. I'm beyond sorry."
"Okay," he says. I smile and laugh slightly, stepping away and brushing tears away from my eyes.
"I won't get together with him," I say quietly.
"Why not?" Charlie asks. "Is it because of what I just said? Because that means nothing. You guys would be good together."
"No," I say and shake my head. "I want something else. I want somebody else."
"What?" He asks. "Who? Thomas?"
I stare at the ground. I open my mouth to say that I want Dallas. I'm ready to tell him everything.
"I don't know what or who I want," I say. "Just not Ray."
But of course, I don't tell him everything.
"You'll figure it out," Charlie tells me. "And in the meantime, you got that sweet little Thomas to keep you company." He whistles and winks at me. I tip back my head, laughing and thankful that I have my friend Charlie back.
Because I can't bare the thought of losing him.
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Charlie and Avril <3
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~Cambrie