Carry Me Home - A LEGEND trilogy (Marie Lu) fanfiction

14: June

I know how selfish and arrogant I am to force Eden to tell Day about what he'd lost, when I can do it on my own.

Stupid, June, I tell myself. You should just have said it to him instead. You can do it. You can answer every question that he'll asked you.

But then again... I know deep down that I can't.

Even if Eden insists that I be the one to tell Day everything now for the good of everyone... well, I know that I don't have the right. Eden has every right to let him know about it because they are brothers who will certainly trust each other so deeply that Day will believe every word Eden says.

I spend the rest of the day checking over the new shift of cadets who are going to patrol the city tonight and the ones positioned to stand guard for the unexpected return ball for Day after ten years.

At 15.00 hours, I return home and receive a package directly from one of Anden's fashion designer. I don't have any plan to attend the ball but an hour later, a make-up artist knocks so impatiently outside my apartment door and without any word, shoves me to sit down in front of a mirror and starts fixing me up. And it doesn't take long for her to finish fixing me up and force me to wear the gown that was sent onto me. It is a lilac plain gown that reaches the floor, partnered up with a glittery white thick belt. Few minutes later, the make-up artist leads me out of my apartment and to a black car waiting outside for me, with the orders of the Elector for me to get in.

Like ordinary balls that I've been to. The only difference is that Day is invited as well, again. Worse is, it's a ball made especially for him.

When I arrive, there are more people in the room than I expected. I always feel so out of place now that I am not a Princeps-Elect like it was ten years ago. I am just one of the military officers around here. There's nothing like feeling so proud and at the same time, so regal and elegant for anyone.

"Ms. Iparis!"

I turn around to find who is the owner of the voice and I somewhat feel disappointed to find out that it's Anden who is calling, not Day. "Elector," I reply as I make a slight bow at him.

He smiles and shakes his head lightly, "How many times should I tell you that you can just call me 'Anden'? Friends, remember?"

"At least once more, Elector," I answer.

He laughs gently. "I hope you are finding this ball... at least, quite different from the previous one. The one when we needed to force Mr. Wing to give up something he didn't want to."

And then it hits me again. I remember that time, ten years ago when Day whose life was somewhat perfect already was called to a party only to find out what the Republic wanted for him. Wishing him to give up his brother to solve the Plague, only to find out that it wasn't Eden's blood that they were after since the start... it had always been mine, that they were after.

"I hope that this ball is just as what I am aware of?" I ask him simply.

He nods. "Yes. Rest assured, June. This party is especially for Day's return, nothing else."

I nod at Anden. "Glad to hear that, Elector." I move my eyes from him and mutter, "Would you excuse me, though?"

But before I can even be out of reach, he grabs me by my arm and I look at him, dread and anger coursing together, rising up. "June, please be careful. I worry about those who attack you and Day yesterday."

I yank my arm away from his grasp and answer as simply as I can, "It's my problem if I'm not careful enough. Not yours."

Before he can even reply and hold me again, I am already out from his radar. Because of too much fear that he'll be able to locate me again and ask me about things like what happened yesterday is already causing me headache. And I don't realize that I suddenly bump right into someone.

"I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to—"

"June."

His grip is so strong on my arms that I don't fall. His voice is so soothing that I can't help not to smile every time I hear his voice. His presence is enough to assure me that everything's alright.

"Daniel?" I ask softly, more to myself than to him.

Of course, who else would it be? Daniel or Day is just standing right in front of me now. Why should I be surprised to find him here in his very own party? Maybe, what surprises me is the fact that the last time I saw him wearing a formal suit was when he still had his long blonde silky hair. But now, his hair is cropped short that makes it much more unfamiliar. Yet, he is still handsome for me.

"I'm sorry," I reply, the moment that I gain my senses again and slowly let my bare arms brush off his gloved hands. "I shouldn't even be here."

"Wait!" he calls out, grabbing my wrist and pulling me closer. His hands grip my arms so strong, his eyes pleading me to listen at him intently, and his body close to me that all the oxygen around the room seems to be washed out.

"I wanted you to listen to me, okay?" he adds.

I nod stubbornly. "Alright. What is it?"

He guides me out of the room fast enough, like he has prepared it beforehand. He walks me through a hallway and then to the nearby room, and closes the door behind us. He tries to flick the light switch but it seems broken. So instead, he draws out the curtains to show the moon on its zenith.

It takes some minutes for him to speak. He just paces the room in long strides and finally stops, and decides to start talking.

"I already know you. You aren't simply June Iparis. You were the girl who'd done everything for me and the Republic ten years ago... as much as Eden have told me," he answers my earlier question. "He even told me that... we loved each other so much then. And we have..." He trails off and stops.

It puts me on edge. I'm curious what will be the next words. But it takes a full minute before I gain the urge to ask him about it, "What is it? We have...?"

Day leans close to my ear and I can feel his hair against my cheek, causing me to shiver and blush lightly. He then whispers carefully, "That we have a child."

"What?!" I immediately blurt out.

Well, yes. We are supposed to have a child. If I wasn't such an idiot to lose our child then... our child would have been ten years old and got to see his father... but then, how could they interact? How would our child accept Day if that had happened and how would Day accept our child in that matter?

I can feel my tears, slowly.

"Guess it isn't true then," Day mutters at me. His expression remains stoic and calm, so unlike the Day I knew when the topic comes to it. "Well, is it? I just want to know, that's all. Because if... you know, we have a child, I know my responsibilities as a father. Yet, I didn't get to see him yesterday if ever or even today..."

It's then that my calculated defenses fall out again. I bury my face in his chest and I can tell that it catches him off guard. But as simply as he can, he surrounds me with his arms calmly and protectively.

"I'm sorry, Day," I mutter into his shirt. I don't care if he can hear me or not.

At least, now he's here again. Even if there are those people who are trying to ask us to pay the debts that are yet to be paid. Even if they try to keep us apart again, I won't allow it.

I will be by his side, even if it's hell. I will protect him, even if it's pain.

Because...

I still love him.