Grant What I Wish

Grant What I Wish - Chapter 18. Breakthrough

Chapter 18. Breakthrough

You're the road and the knower of roads,

more than maps, more than love.

-Rumi

Nottingham

1195

At the sight of Marian sitting before the fire, Guy felt a rush of joy flood through him. She had come to his room once more! While he had been searching all over the castle keep for her, she had been waiting for him. Studying her thoughtful mien, he wondered where she had been and what was on her mind.

Noting the serious expression on her face, he felt his initial joy fade. She regrets what passed between us, he though leadenly. She has come to tell me that we must concentrate our minds and bodies on the crisis that faces us, not on what may be between us. He sighed heavily; his head told him that she was right, but his heart cried out for her.

He shut the door behind him and moved cautiously toward her, trying to gauge her mood. "Do I have you to thank for the bath water?" he asked, content to momentarily avoid the subject she had come to discuss with him.

"Yes," she replied with a faint smile. "I thought you might appreciate it after the dust and toil of your evening's task."

Before he could reply, she added, "I heard from Much that your mission was successful. He told me that Archer joined you."

"He did," he replied, looking at her with such intent admiration that she felt warm from his regard. "Archer told me that you were responsible. We might not have made it off the field alive if it hadn't been for his intervention. Thank you." His voice was soft and his affectionate expression so unlike anything she had ever seen on his face before that her pulse sped. She felt clumsy and uncertain of herself, and her nerves fluttered in anticipation of what she must tell him.

"Archer told me that he knows you are a woman," Guy continued.

Marian nodded. "He discovered that I was a woman when he assaulted me as I walked down the corridor."

Guy's expression darkened. "He did not tell me that. Did he hurt you?" Brother or no brother, no one was to handle Marian roughly.

She gave a small snort. "No, he was the one who was hurt. I thought he was an assailant, and dealt with him accordingly."

Guy chuffed out a laugh. "I am surprised he was fit to assist us, if that was the case," he said wryly. "In any event, his appearance on the battlefield saved the day."

He moved cautiously toward the fire and crouched in front of her to bring himself to her level. Looking directly into her eyes, he said earnestly, "I won't ask what transpired between you and Archer, but I will tell you how grateful I am that you spoke with him and convinced him to join us. We might not have made it back alive, otherwise."

"Then, I am doubly glad that I did speak to him," she replied quietly. "I would have never forgiven myself if anything had happened to you before...." Her voice trailed off as she struggled for words.

"Before what?" he asked curiously.

"If you had died..." she started again, twisting her hands in agitation.

He grasped her hands and held them between his own. "What?" he insisted urgently, "What would you do if I died?"

She glanced up at him and he was stunned to see tears shimmering in her eyes. "I would no longer want to live," she said simply. He dropped her hands in surprise and she stood, moving toward the fire as she gathered her thoughts.