Life After Baby

Planning with Faith

Derek woke up to the sound of raindrops outside his window. He looked at the clock: 9:04am. He looked next to him, but Maria wasn’t there. He got up, slipped on his shorts, and walked to her office. He peeked inside. She sat at her desk while she typed on her laptop.
“Hey,” he said as he walked over to her and kissed her cheek. “What are you doing?”
“I just got an email from the wedding planner. Look at the photos she sent of one of the venues.”
She showed him a photo of the outside of μπλε hotel. It was spacious, white, and near the water.
“Do you like it?” she asked. He thought for a moment.
“I actually like the idea of a wedding near the water,” he replied.
She looked at him inquisitively. “Like a… beach wedding?” she asked with her eyes squinted. He laughed.
“Yeah, that sounds really nice. What do you think?”
“I agree. I’ll let Lola know.”
“Cool. I’m going to make a smoothie, do you want one?”
“Sure, you know what I like.”
He came back a few minutes later with delicious smoothies for them both.
“I take it Dia hasn’t woke up yet?”
“Not yet. She will any moment now, I’m sure.”
And sure enough, just as she said it, they heard her. Maria gave him an I-told-you-so look. Just then an alert flashed in her e-mail.
“Will you get her? I have to check this.”
As Derek left the room, she sighed. Just minutes before he walked in she had finished reading the tabloid article. It left a lump in her throat. Dia was Derek’s, she knew that because she had been faithful to him since the beginning. But someone had the audacity to try to convince everyone else otherwise. This did not leave her happy. A few moments later, she heard Dia mumbling. She walked into the living room, where Dia was playing on the floor. “Hi, baby!” Maria exclaimed as she knelt to pick her up. She kissed her face. They all sat on the floor and Derek held Dia up so she was standing on her own two feet.
“Ready Dia?” he asked the baby. “Walk to mommy!”
Dia took a few steps, then fell with flailing arms. They laughed. “Let’s try again,” he said. They tried a few more times, but she couldn’t get it. He walked along side her over to Maria and plopped on the floor next to her. Dia laughed and plopped, too, then got distracted with one of her light-up toys. Maria watched her as she played. She smiled and noted in her mind that this was one of the small pleasures in life-- one that she’s always wanted and one that she almost missed out on. She never forgot that.
“I read the article,” Derek said, distracting her thoughts.
“You did? What did you think?” she asked. She was nervous, but she knew she had to ask.
“It’s crap. Like every other ‘source’ article out there is.”
“You don’t believe it, do you?”
He looked at Dia. She already had a head of light brown hair and big gray eyes. She had an infectious smile like her mom (but luckily not her laugh).
“I don’t. I know she’s mine. I don’t doubt it. The tabloids are just out to cause drama so that maybe once in awhile they can write something that is actually true.”
He leaned over and kissed her forehead. “I’m not worried, and you shouldn’t be either. If we ignore it, it will go away.”
“You sound so sure,” she remarked.
“I have faith.”

 

By 2 o’clock the rain had stopped and the sun was peeking through the clouds. After months of searching for the style of dress she wanted, Maria went to the bridal gown store. Julianne, Rachel and Cheryl went with her. They watched as she tried on dress after dress, none of which really caught any of them as something she would wear.
“Ok, there’s one more and if it isn’t the one, I’ll have to keep looking,” she said to them with a small sigh. Five minutes had passed and she hadn’t come back out. Rachel and Cheryl were talking amongst themselves, so Julianne decided to go and see what the matter was.
“Maria? Is everything okay?” she asked, walking into the dressing room. Maria was sitting in the same dress with her head in her hands and tears in her eyes. Instantly, Julianne went to comfort her.
“What’s wrong?”
“I really wish my mom could be here to see this,” she said between sniffles and tears. “It’s something she really wanted for me, and now I won’t even get to experience it with her. I’m getting married and my mom won’t even be there.”
Julianne hugged her, but didn’t say a word.
“I just always thought she would be. It never crossed my mind that I’d be here like this. It’s not fair.”
“I know, babe,” she responded still hugging her. “It never is. But you just have to know and have faith that she will be there in spirit.”
She broke the hug and looked into Maria’s eyes. She wiped her tears.
“I’ll be here for you. And you’re marrying one of the best men I know.”
Maria smiled and wiped her own tears.
“Look at me, I’m a mess.”
“Oh, my goodness,” Julianne said, almost out of nowhere. “Is that the last dress you have to try on?”
She pointed to the dress next to her.
“Yeah, I figured it’d be good for the beach. But I don’t know, I still have to try it.”
“Ok, I’ll go wait out there then.”
“No, please stay. I know it’s silly, but I don’t want to be alone.”
“Okay,” Julianne smiled. And she did. The dress ended up not being as great as they thought it was, but Maria still kept a hold on it, just in case.

When she got home, she spent some time with Dia before putting her to sleep. As she laid her in her crib, she took a deep breath and felt the sudden urge to cry. She kissed her baby and turned on the nightlight. She walked to her bedroom and sat on the bed just as Derek walked in.
“How was dress shopping?” he asked. “Find anything good?”
“Nope,” she replied, “still looking.”
“Are you okay? You seem a little sad.”
“Just missing my mom, that’s all.”
He sat next to her and put his hand on her leg.
“Let me know if you want to talk about it,” he said with a sincere smile. She smiled back. “What’s on the wedding agenda next?”
“We just have to meet with Lola to discuss some more about what we want. Like the menu and cake and stuff. Nothing major really. A few more meetings and we should be good.”
“Then we’ll be getting married,” he replied.
“Yes,” she smiled the most sincere smile all day. “Finally.”