DOPPELGANGER

Chapter 4 - Stesso

I will just say this. Nothing really happens until I hear back from Dr. Kris Lisa. The next few weeks until then were boring. You know, the every day thing - waking up, breakfast, board games, lunch, TV, dinner, sleep, repeat. I had my routine counselor check ups with Dr. Kris. We kept them about why I was actually there. Every once in a while, until I actually got more information, I would ask her - just for a little update. We kept it in the hush. We didn't talk about what I saw on the TV that one day. There was no need to. Clearly it was the other me - the doppelganger. Something did bother me though. That one nurse saw what I saw on the TV. However, she didn't mention anything to me after that. Did she believe me or was it something more? Another Josiah in the area? I mean, "my head" was covered over with a cloth. Maybe she didn't think much of it. It doesn't matter in the end what she things anyway. This will turn out to be a full-on war against me and myself. She won't be involved. Me, him, Dr. Kris Lisa, my parents and sister, and everyone else who i'll end up caring about in the end. So, with all that said, let's fast forward a few weeks.

"Josiah"

My eyes open up. I look over to the doorway, still half asleep. It's the nurse that doesn't believe shit. 

"Josiah, I am sorry for this being sudden however Dr. Kris would like to speak to you. She says it's regarding your admittance." 

I sit up and smile at her, "I wonder what this is about?" I stand up. "I'll get ready right away."

As she leaves, I walk up to one of the desks in the room where I keep my clothing. I start to get dressed and take a moment to look outside at the windows once again. It's so early. Where's the morning rush? I look at the clock hanging up in the room. It's six in the morning. That's rather odd. People should be scattering around for the next three hours. I'm dwelling on this, aren't I? I need to snap out of it. Clearly i'm not a morning person.

All dressed up, I walk out of the room and towards the main desk where the nurse walks around to key me out of the ward. She lays a hand down on my shoulder, "Josiah, can I trust you?" I look up at her, "What do you mean?" She clears her throat, "Well, Josiah, you've been here for quite some time now. Everyone seems to like you and you are a good person. What i'm trying to say is, if you know your way to her office, I won't have to walk you there." This is odd. Very odd. As much as i'd like to just walk out of this hospital, surely that wouldn't go well. It's not worth trying. I do what I need to do and smile, "Don't worry about me. I'm looking forward to seeing what Dr. Kris wants." She sighs, "Thank you, Josiah. This won't be an every day thing. I just have to prepare for the morning. It's unusual for a counselor wanting to see a patient this early - or even be in at this time." I nod. She starts to walk away as I go about heading to Dr. Kris' office.

As I walk around the halls, it's pretty quiet. A few what I think are visitors and doctors from other departments going about their businesses. This is my first time seeing people in what i'm assuming is just a general hospital. Or maybe I have and I wasn't paying attention. I don't know anymore. These past few weeks being here have got to me. I noticed a doctor's name tag. "Marie" That is when I noticed was under it. A logo of some sort. It looked like a combination of letters... A...C...H.... Oh. Atlantic City Hospital. Our city's general hospital. At least I know where i'm at now. 

As I concentrate too hard on such information, i've finally made it to the office of Dr. Kris Lisa. I stare up at the wooden door with her name plastered on it. I take a breath and knock on the door. It slowly opens and I can somewhat see the inside. It's dark. Completely dark. I notice Kris peeking out from a corner of the door. "Josiah!" She says, all but loudly. She sounds surprised. I bite down on my lip and squint my eyes a bit, "I'm here.." That's when she slips out of her own office and into the hallway. "Josiah, what are you doing here?" My eyes widen, "Dr. Kris, you asked me to come here. At least that is what one of the nurses that woke me up told me." She clears her throat, "Oh, is that so?" I start to worry, "What's going on? Is everything okay?" She starts to back away into her office. "Josiah, wait here." The door shuts. I'm standing, staring at a door. No reason as to why. It's just happening.

As I look around, I see a few doctors going about in the hallway. Nothing out of the ordinary, I guess. I lean into the wooden door, "Dr. what are you doing? Why won't you let me in?" There's no answer. Then, silence. I look around again. It's just me in the hallway now. I look at one of the many clocks mounted on the walls around. Seven in the morning. The door opens completely this time. "Come in." Dr. Kris is welcoming me into her office. Despite still being dark. I shrug and walk in and sit down on the couch as if it's like every other session. She quickly shuts the door behind me and walks over to her desk. She sit down in her chair and starts shuffling  through papers, "Now where was I?" I concentrate on the papers to see what they inform. That's when I realized the whole meaning behind this visit - hopefully. 

"Josiah, what i'm about to tell you stays between us - forever. For now." She's still concentrating on the papers, organizing them." I nod, "Yes, of course. What is this about?" She chuckles a bit and turns on a desk light. Finally, shed some LIGHT onto this. I'm sorry. I had to. "Josiah, over the past few weeks, I had the pleasure to gather up a lot of information regarding your stay in the hospital and the other you. My eyes widen, "The other me..?" She looks at me sternly, "The other you." She hands me some papers, "Josiah, the other you isn't who you thought he was. He's not you." My heart sinks. What is she saying? I look down at the papers. It's... me. My name and everything. "This is me." Her voice startles me, "Excuse me?" I look up at her. "You mean [censored]? You think that's you?" I'm so confused. I look down at the papers again, "Dr. Kris... this is me... see?" I point at the picture. 

"Josiah, you are not [censored]. You are not the person who robbed the bank a couple weeks ago. You are not the person who was arrested for theft because you are in here. You are not the person who got out of it so easily for having good lawyers and close friends. You are also not the person who didn't even need to rob a bank because he's filthy rich." I'm in shock. "Dr. Kris...." She continues to look at me, "Why do you look so confused?" I gulp. She sure has an attitude today. "Dr. Kris, are you mad at me? She looks away, "No, Josiah, I am not mad at you. I am trying to help you deal with yourself and your delusions." That is when it all made sense. She's not trying to help me. I am so heartbroken. To think she was going to get me out of here and figure out what the hell is going on with me and my doppelganger.

"Dr. Kris! You have got to believe me! Do you NOT see myself in these papers?" I stand up and sit them on her desk. She closes her eyes and gathers the papers, "Josiah, for the last time. You are not [censored]. He is a bad man. He robbed a bank.. robs... who knows... is known to have a private drug business but gets away with it all because of his money. He's not a good person, Josiah. You are." I feel like I could cry. "Dr. Kris, can I keep some of these papers?" She nods. I grab some of them and hide them inside of my shirt. She spins around in her chair to face me, "Josiah, I know you don't see what I see but believe me, once you stop blaming yourself for everything, your vision will be more clear. I nod and walk out of her office, shutting the door on the way out. 

As i'm walking down the halls I continue to think about what happened. Is there some truth to what she told me? Am I really delusional? I've never had problems seeing anything ever before. However, if she is truthful, that would make sense about seeing myself on the television as well. That wouldn't explain why she led me on though. Here I am overthinking everything again. Fuck mornings. 

I finally made it back to the mental ward. I walk into my and lay on the bed, closing my eyes. I thought today would've brought answers. Instead, it brought heartache and a hell of a headache. I decide to forget all of it and dose off. Little did I realize I wasn't alone in the room.