Crossfire

"Thought You Were Gone Too"

Merlin

My head was swimming in drowsiness. I felt pain rush up and encase me in a blanket layered with fatal weapons. The physical inflictions weren't even the worst of them, though.
Feeling my eyes peel open, I was then faced with a blurry vision, seeing a foreign room. I blinked once, trying to remember what happened. My mind was still in shock from something that had recently occurred. I sat up in bed, giving a slight gasp of the sudden flare that trailed up my body. My eyes instantly traveled to the wound, pupils anxiously gazing at the sight of dried blood on the cloth wrapped around my side. I scrunched my eyebrows in confusion, when I then suddenly remembered—
Arthur.
Swiping myself off the bed, I let the soles of my feet come in contact with the ground. They curled away in fright, before gently grazing against the floor. I stood up, then attempting to make my way to the door of the room—stumbling, gripping the stone wall for support. After a heaved breath, I let my head lean against the door, resting my body for a short moment. A sudden drowned sigh escaped lips from behind the door. Squinting, I then delicately placed my hand on the handle, pushing the door open. I stared, eyes now widening with shock.
"Mom?" I croaked.
She turned, seeing me, her eyes flooding with relief. Then, standing up, she raced to me, pulling me in for a soft hug, careful to avoid any injuries. I reluctantly replied with a weak grasp, breathing in my mother's scent, feeling her presence soothe me. 
"What are you doing here?" I mumbled into her clothing, awaiting my lips to let another question escape. My eyes closed for a moment, trying to focus on anything but the previous predicament.
My mother then pulled away, rubbing my arms in a protective fashion, scanning my face for any dismantled emotion. "Word broke out that Morgana had been defeated—dead." She paused, licking her lips in anxiety. "When I heard of Balinor, Morgana and..." she trailed off, searching my eyes. "Him," she then said in a hushed tone. "I thought you were gone too." Giving a soft sigh with laced relief, she cupped my cheek with care, letting her other hand pulling a loose strand from my face. "I'm so glad you're still here."
I closed my eyes. I'm not.
"He's dead," I softly sobbed.
My mother then hushed me, cradling my head as if glass, placing a kiss to my hair. "I know, darling."
"Everybody's gone."
"You still have me, dear," she whispered to my reply, pulling me deeper into her chest.
My voice choked, disregarding her former statement. "You lost everything, too."
"Except you." My mother let go of me, letting her hands rub my arms as soothingly as possible, a frown washing over her features every time a tear shed from my eye.
Out of drowsiness, a sudden wave hit me, as my eyes rolled back, my body falling into my mother's grasp.
"Merlin, honey," she spoke with worry.
Exhaling a pained breath, my hands found themselves deliriously clawing at her clothing, trying to maintain composure. "I'm tired, mother."
"Alright," she breathed, beginning to help me carry myself to the room I awoke in. "Let's get you to bed, darling."
Guiding me to the bed, she didn't mess with the fumbled covers—just layed me gently on the mattress, starting to pull the blankets up.
"Where am I?" I mumbled with fatigue.
"Aeyland's castle. The court physician is currently taking care of you." My mother then stopped when she reached my wound, eyeing it with concern.
"Mom-"
"You always were such a fighter," she wetly laughed, rubbing her thumb gently across the bandage. My mother's eyes then met mine, as her lips curled downwards, fingers then meeting my cheek, my mother then grazing the skin with delicate motions. "You don't deserve any of this, Merlin."
My eyes instantly shut, the thoughts—the memories returning to me. "Mother, I just want to sleep."
Sighing, she reluctantly agreed, finishing her action when the blankets made contact with my chin. I blinked, looking up to her blearily. She gave a soft smile with an undertone of sadness as a reply, kissing my forehead gently. My mother's hands then found my hair, raking it, waiting for the motion to lull me to sleep. I didn't argue—just weakly leaned into her touch.
"How is everyone else doing?" I asked in a disarranged whisper.
"They're holding up," my mother's voice sounded off, her tone frayed. "They've been worried about you, Merlin." She paused. "They are all afraid that you won't be the same."
Letting out a soft huff, I let my mother's hands guide me with care, as I then returned to the former drowsiness. "A death does that you," I mumbled. "Multiple deaths." I could practically hear her frown.
Moments passed, and I was on the verge of sleep, my mother basking in my presence, her worried and tense posture slightly relaxed now, while I was the exact opposite.
My mind fought for resilience—to find some sort of comfort and happiness.
But everything was dark. Cold. Unwelcoming.
My brain was not the only thing ticking down. It was only a matter of time before I exploded. Each digit was bringing me closer to death.
I could almost feel its touch. Cold, yes it was; but it was also welcoming.
Could death be my comfort?
Planting a kiss to my locks, my mother's hand then escaped from my hair, as she then stood up. I could hear the click of her shoes going off, as she made her way to the door. "Goodnight, Merlin," she softly said.
I was already asleep before I could hear the door click shut.

A/N: Hello everybody! Here's the "cliché-chapter-that-reflects-the-character's-emotions-and-stance-on-life" chapter of the book! If you've enjoyed this book so far, please leave a vote or comment! The support means a lot to me! (We're nearing closer to the end lol I know you're all dying inside) Bye!