I'm Gonna Love You Through It

Part 45

I’m gonna love you through it

Part 45

*Selena’s POV*

I sat nervously in the exam room in the oncology wing, wait for the doctor to return with, hopefully good, results. I was startled by the sound of knocking on the door before my doctor walked in.

“Okay, so Miss Gomez I have your results, as you asked for,” she stated looking at the folder in her hands.

I took a deep breath closing my eyes waiting for her to go on.

“I hate to say this but it looks like you have less than a year to live. It could be anywhere between 6-9 months. The cancer is reaching your heart and there’s nothing we can do to stop it. Your body is rejecting all treatments. I’m sorry.”

I sat there feeling tears streaming down my face.

“I’m very sorry. I’ll leave you alone now,” she said softly as she walked out of the room.

I let my face fall into my hands letting the tears come out. Bentley would never know who I was, just like me with my father. I would never get to watch Bentley go off to his first day of school and never see him graduate. I wouldn’t be there when he met the woman of his dreams and got married to her. I wouldn’t be there to watch my grandkids playing in the backyard. I would barely be there to see my own kid do it.

What was I going to tell Justin? He couldn’t raise a family on his own, nor did I want him to.

The worst part was coming here knowing that, that was going to be the outcome. That’s why I wanted the wedding to be so soon. I wanted to die married to Justin. I hoped I had some time to have at least one more kid.

As I drove home, I thought about all the different ways I could tell Justin the news. When I pulled into the driveway, I decided that I wasn’t going to tell Justin. I couldn’t see him upset like that; it would kill me, no pun intended.

I looked in the mirror fixing my make-up the best I could before going inside to face Justin. I walked through the door, hoping and praying that he wouldn’t notice how off I was.

“Hey babe. How did it go?” he asked looking at me as she stood up from the sofa.

I gave him the same fake smile I use when the pain from the cancer is getting to me, “It was fine.”

“Well, what did they say?” he asked wrapping his arms around me.

“You know, the same they always do,” I shrugged making it look like no big deal.

He nodded not wanting to press the subject any further, “What do you want for dinner Sel?”

“I think I’ll pass. I’m really tired. I think I’m just going to go to bed. I love you,” I said kissing his cheek, unwinding from his arms before he could object, running up the stairs.

*Justin’s POV*

I slumped my shoulders as I watched Selena run up the stairs.

Something was going on that I didn’t know about. Or maybe I was just being stupid. Maybe she was just in pain and wanted to go to bed like she said.

I sighed and looked back over at Bentley who was playing on the floor with his toys. “What are we going to do about your momma? Huh, buddy?”

After a while, I got up from the place I was sitting and picked up Bent. I made my way up the stairs and strolled into the nursery before laying Bentley down for bed.

After finally putting him to sleep, I walked across the hallway to mine and Selena’s bedroom. Just as I was about to open to door, I heard whimpers. I opened to door slowly whispering, “Selena are you okay?”

I saw the lump on the bed stiffen as she pretended to be asleep, I sighed, “I know you’re awake. I heard you crying, what’s wrong Selena? Talk to me.”

She sighed knowing that she was caught, “It’s nothing. I just don’t feel good, nothing to worry about. I’ll be okay.”

I sighed taking off my shirt and pants leaving me in my boxers before climbing into bed pulling her close to me. She nuzzled her head into my chest holding onto me.  “It will be okay. I’m going to make it okay,” I whispered to her as I held her close.