BLOODLINES ↠ JON SNOW

XIX. SILENCE

XIX.  SILENCE

JON'S HANDS FELT LIKE ICE AGAINST HER BURNING CALLOUSED PALMS. No amount of furs were enough to bring the warmth back to him, and that scared Amodera more than anything had before. She couldn't lose him, not now he was finally back in her arms. After all she had lost, to lose him too would be the cruelest of fates. Amodera gripped his hand as if it were a lifeline, shutting her eyes tight. It had been many years since she'd prayed to the Old Gods, but she would suffer anything to keep Jon safe -- always and forever. Never in her life had she imagined to love someone so deeply; leaders rarely received such luxuries. But she realised now that she did love him. Perhaps she always had.

"Amodera..." His voice was weak and soft, but it was like music to her ears. Amodera snapped her eyes open as soon as her name had left his lips, praying to every god under the sun that it had not been in her head. But there he was, watching her with those exhausted dark eyes she longed to see for every day, as long as she lived.

Words caught in her throat, strangled by the shock, the joy, the fear. She wanted to scream her thanks to the heavens, to kiss every inch of his body, and relish every moment with him. Alas, only two words managed to slip from her tongue, "I'm sorry..."

A frown formed upon Jon's face. He pulled himself up on the bed, wincing at the pain of the movements. But he endured it. He would endure anything for her. "What for?"

Guilt pressed upon Amodera's chest, like a weight bearing down to crush her spirit. "For leaving you." She whispered, her voice tangled with remorse. "I should've fought more. I should've gone to you." Amodera paused, grinding her teeth softly. "I should've stayed."

Jon simply shook his head, squeezing her delicate fingers. "If you had stayed, you'd have died." He replied calmly, lifting his hand to cup her cheek.

Amodera nested into his cool fingers, closing her eyes for a moment as she savoured his touch. "But I-" She paused, opening her eyes to look at him again. She wanted to stay it: to tell him how much she loved him, how much it killed her to leave him behind. The thought scared her, but the idea that she may never get to say it scared her more. "...I love you."

Amodera's voice was softer, more vulnerable than he had ever seen. She was opening herself up to him, for once, and it was beautiful. Jon couldn't help the smile that tugged at his lips. "You are why I survived. The thought of seeing you...being able to tell you that I love you, too." He declared, a pride laced within his voice.

Amodera felt as thought she might melt beneath his touch. Why had she waited so long, been so afraid? If only she had told him the truth back in Winterfell -- told him she never wanted to leave his side. How foolish she had been, wasting so much precious time apart from him. No longer, she vowed. Wherever he goes, I shall be right there beside him. Leaning down towards him, Amodera paused, meeting his gaze with an unwavering urgency. She pressed her mouth to his, savouring the shape of his lips. He tasted like joy and hope, but there was always something lurking in the shadows. It was joy with a noose around it's neck.

Jon pulled back slowly, reluctant to part with the warmth of her mouth; the smell of pine trees that lingered on her skin. He glanced up at her, studying the features of her face: every crease in her skin, every scar, every flush of colour in her cheeks. She was beauty enclosed in chaos, and he wanted nothing more than to be with her for every second that remained in his life. "Marry me." He said, voice soft and low, like the seas around them.

Amodera's eyes widened slightly in shock. "What?"

"Marry me." He repeated, taking both her hands in his own. "I want you by my side; in battle and diplomacy. I want to spend my life with you. I want to wake up in your arms, and fall asleep in them." He paused, closing his eyes as if to hold onto the moment forever. "I want to build a life with you; start a family with you."

Amodera stared at him, all semblance of composure drained from her body. They had endured so much hate and war together, and yet they had found comfort in one another's arms. She owed so much to her people, but she owed him too. If she were to die fighting the Night King and his army, then she wished to die as his wife. Amodera smiled, a soft laugh breaking through her fear; her amazement. "Yes." She cried out, breaking the uncertain silence with a brazen hope. "Yes, of course. I love you, Jon. I never want to leave you again."

Jon felt a weight lift of his shoulders at her reply. She was all he needed, and he knew that now. A year, a month, a day as her husband was life enough to live. He didn't care if it weakened the North, or if it wasn't a political alliance. All he cared about was her, for the rest of his life. "The minute we arrive in Winterfell after taking the wight to the Lannister's, we can go to the godswood." Jon sat up, stroking the side of her face softly with his thumb. "I want to be with you: always and forever."

Amodera smiled, leaning forwards and pressing her lips delicately upon his own. "Always and forever."

《》

AUTHOR'S NOTE;
Surprise! Amodera and Jon are gonna get hitched and I'm so excited to write it. Is it bad I want my own character + ship to be canon?

Sorry it's been so long since I've updated, I've had a lot of college work recently! How are you all? How did you like the chapter?☆

Please vote and comment what you thought of this chapter! I really hoped you liked it, even though it's all mushy and romantic instead of action-y. Thank you for supporting my account and this story! I hope you all have an amazing day! - CAT ♡