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Chapter 25 – In Which Chen Locks Us All Out of the Bathroom

Deer Luhan,

EXO-M… where do I start?  Now this is more what I expected of dorm life.  The place is a tip already, and at a rough estimate, I’d say it’ll be a week and a half before it’s impossible to walk across the living room floor because of discarded clothes.  Nobody knows where anything is in the kitchen because we don’t have D.O. to organise it and Lay seems to forget where he’s put everything.  And the boisterous behaviour – you guys really let loose here, don’t you?  But seriously, God forbid anybody ever finds out what you’re really like behind that front door, because it would ruin your image forever.

Leigh

I was converted to the EXO-M way of dorm life early the next morning.  And considering I really resent being woken up before seven a.m., that’s actually saying something.

“Luhan!” Tao’s voice was yelling as if the building was about to collapse, “Luhan, get out of there!”

I leapt out of my bed with a start, accidentally knocking a chair over onto Lay’s bed and waking him up, too.

Giving a bleary yawn, he stretched and sat up.

“Wassa matter?”

“Luhan!” Tao yelled again.  I heard something whacking against something.  Possibly a fist against a door.  Tao was kind of mad.  I dithered, wondering if it was better to face his wrath or pretend it wasn’t me, whatever it was.

“Go calm him down,” Lay mumbled, flopping back onto the bed and pulling the duvet up over himself.  “He obviously wants you.”

Reluctantly, I shuffled out into the hallway.  Tao was jogging frantically on the spot by the bathroom door, one hand reaching towards his privates and the other hammering against the wood.

“Luhan, will you get out of there?!  I’m dying!”

I tapped him on the shoulder, rubbing one sleep-filled eye with my free hand.

For a moment, he stilled, one leg raised in mid-jog and his arm frozen in the act of pounding at the door again.  His head tilted back as he looked at me.

Then everything snapped back to normal and he resumed killing the door.

“Kris!  Get a move on – I need to use the bathroom!”

After a couple of minutes, Kris appeared, followed by a bleary-eyed Xiumin.

“Tao, it’s half-six in the morning,” Kris mumbled.  “What are you doing?”

“Somebody’s locked himself in the toilet!” Tao fumed.  “He’s been in there twenty minutes!”

“Well, it obviously wasn’t me,” Kris yawned.  Tao scowled at him and then went back to hammering on the door.

“Chen, you troll, open up!”

One of the bedroom doors opened and Chen popped his head out.  “What?  I’m trying to sleep.  Do you have any idea what time it is?”

Even garbling his words around a yawn, he sounded royally pissed.  Tao decided it was best to vent his frustration at somebody else.

“Xiu— Lay!  Will you please get your behind out of the bathroom?”

I frowned.

“Lay, for the love of God!”

I tapped Xiumin on the shoulder, and then pointed to my room and mimed sleeping.

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