Hozier || Solby

To Be Alone

COLBY

This boy who drew me into his soft embrace gave me an energy and revitalization with every kiss he placed on my lips. His tender glances and loving words brought me a sense of peace and fullness I've never known before. I've never know such feelings because of who I am.

I am a creature filled with a void, emptiness hidden only by the clothes on my back. I can't bear to be with this boy who filled me with such hope, but I couldn't bear to be separated from him. My selfish heart feeds off of his innocence, my shame only diminished by hunger and wickedness. His words had an effect on me, pulling me closer when I should draw away. The sweetness that dripped from his mouth sent me spiraling into a deep paralysis that kept me from running from the boy I was bound to destroy. Too many things I left unspoken, the thoughts that filled my head when I was alone we're the kind I must keep to myself or fear desertion. And my selfish cruelty could not bear to be deserted.

One day he will desert me, and I will crumble into darkness. Nothing will be left of me, simply a pile of ash and dust. To think of such things is torture. Someday, I will take him with me to somewhere where we will be alone. Where nothing could get in the way of us and our bittersweet love.

The woods had been my isolation. There I could control the screaming in my ears, and when I couldn't, there was nothing I could harm. When Sam followed me into the woods, he became my isolation. Whenever he is with me, I fade away and I leave behind the skin of a lonely and wretched man. But I know who I am when I'm alone.