Thought

1

Dear diary

They tell me to be normal
They tell me im not normal
They say u are not aloud
They say i tell only lies

I see what i see
My world is just diffrent in my eyes.
I feel pain
I see people getting hurt
But im not aloud to feel because
I should just move on

They say feelings are lies but why do i feel the pain
They say it aint real but why am i afraid
They say i am wrong
They say i should know
Why

....

But i dont
I dont know
Why
How
When

Its just there like demons in my head telling me to do awfull things
Telling me that i am nothing
Telling me nobody cares
Showing me what they want
They show me the world where i am the monster

But i dont wanna be the momster
I wanna be good
I want te help people but every day i battle
I fight
I will be trown in the ring and see who wins
Them ...
Or me
Each day is diffrent
And each time it gets harder to fight
Cause i am fighting myself
I am the demons the monster it so tells me to be
And nobody can help me

So please understand and dont tell me to change
Dont tell me im a liar
Dont tell me im not a fighter

I fight everyday
Every hour
Every minute
Every second
I try to change and im telling the truth

But you telling me this is just breaking me before my battle begins

-SCK