Never too Late

Chapter One: Jennifer Adams

My hand shook as I gripped the kitchen knife. I was sprawled out on the floor of an abandoned alley, under the setting sky. Wisps of gray and black. That's all I could make out through my cloudy, bloodshot eyes. Sweat dripped down my forehead and into my eyes. I squinted and blinked, trying to focus my eyes. My breath came out in raspy heavy sighs and my head felt clouded. Should'nt have drank so much...

I angled my head to the side and belched. Everything wreaked. 

I looked down at my right hand which was gripping the knife. It was shaking like mad and my palms were sweating. Slowly and forcefully, I brought up my trembling left hand towards the knife. I ran the tip of the knife along the wrist of my left hand. Now my entire body was trembling violently. 

Disturbing scenes flashed before my eyes: My dad pulling a knife on my mom, my dad kicking at my mom and me, the gang beating up those kids, twisting the boy's neck, blood everywhere, screams everywhere...

Shit. I couldn't take it anymore. 

I squeezed my eyes shut and let the tears well up. When I looked down at my wrist again, sobs broke out and I was crying. Dark blood pooled into my palms and leaked onto the cracked white concrete. I was shaking and crying, watching the blood drip into the deep cracks and stain my shirt.

I threw myself into a ball and sobbed my lungs out. I cried and cried until my chest ached. Then I screamed. I screamed until I thought my throat would rip apart.

I looked down at my wrist and dropped the bloody knife. With shaky hands, I pressed the heel of my other hand against  the cut to stop the blood from gushing out. I was gasping for air.

I was shocked at my stupidity. Suicide... was not the answer. It couldn't be. Could it? 

My chest was heaving up and down rapidly. Slowly, I made myself take deep slow breaths and calm myself down. But I couldn't calm down; I was shaking violently and whimpering. By now, my whole shirt was soaked in blood. I let out a long jaggedy breath and closed my eyes. My head rolled to the side.

When I peeked them open, whifts of pink and orange slashed across the darkening sky. That was the last thing I saw before passing out.

That and the mocking glint of the knife. 

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