Fireworks and Monday Mornings

Chapter 3

     We all have memories. Some are floating in our minds with muddled confusion, never really becoming any clearer, staying indistinct clouds in our brain. We can't go back and wipe off the dust and relive it, reminding ourselves to remember the details while were living the now clouded memory. They'll always be lost somewhere in our brains, maybe someday they'll become clear, maybe on the days that they stand irrelevant slivers of our past.

   Other memories swim in our minds with a distinct clarity. Some we enjoy reliving like watching our favorite movie, others we wish we could forget. 

 I wish I could forget that night.

  It was last February, a bit warm for the winter. The air was still crisp and cold, so I remember grabbing a coat on my way out.  There was a party that night that my best friend Hunter had told me about, or really I had heard about it from everyone around school. 'Tiff will be there, you should hit that shit up bro.' were his exact words, he was obviously so well spoken.The details of the night were so sharp they cut my mind, causing a sharp pain in my head.

  Tiff was this girl I had my sights set on for the past month or so. I wasn't one to get all caught up with girls and relationships or even hookups, they always led to disappointment and regret. However, Tiff was fun and hot and I was leaving for college in a few months. I didn't really have much to lose.

 Turns out the party was a bust, Tiff wasn't there and the beer was warm and flat and the music was  bad rap that was way too loud. All I could really do was keep up the facade and keep filling my cup with the watered down liquor and talk to people I barely knew. 

 I remember looking at the clock.

 12:34 in large green numbers.

 My head hurt, it was just because the music was loud.

 I turned my head back to the girls I was talking to. She was a short brunette with a red winter hat on. I remember thinking she must be hot in that hat. I was dying in the smoky living room. I could hear someone in the bedroom. Some guy was getting lucky. Even though my senses were magnified in that moment I could not remember how much alcohol I had consumed that night. Nor could I remember how long I had been at the party.

I looked at the clock again.

12:37

"I should go." I told the brunette. She nodded and grabbed my arm. She thought I was taking her home. I thought about it, but moved her arm and shook my head. Looking back, it was the best decision I had ever made in my life. Or maybe not. Maybe we would go to her house, I could have avoided that road. My life wouldn't be altered dramatically. 

 But everything happens for a reason.

 ---

 Even though it was only eight I decided to go to bed. I would be lying if I said the work today hadn’t tired me out. also, I didn’t have much else to do. My iPod was supposed to be coming in the mail sometime this week, so I assumed that would be how I spent most of my time. If July showed me the library I could use the computer to buy some songs.

 I don't remember fallling asleep, but I woke when my alarm went off. I was the first one up, even before Cornelia.

 I showered, trying to get the perspiration, which had become something I was almost used to seeing it was pretty constant, off every inch of my body. The heat was unbearable. When I got my first check I would definitely buy a fan. Even though I wasn’t supposed to be getting a check, it was in the agreement.

 I went downstairs about an hour later to see July and Mr. Gainsley eating breakfast. There was fresh fruit and pastries all set out on the table, my stomach growled and I realized I hadn’t eaten in nearly 24 hours.

 ”Morning Mr. Morton! Hope you’re hungry!” When he talked my ears vibrated, giving me a headache.

 ”I am, thank you sir.” I nodded and started filling my plate. It was silent for awhile, the only sound was clinking forks and light chewing. The silence was broken with Mr. Gainsley’s booming voice.

 ”Oh July would it kill you to wear a real shirt?” He grumbled. July looked at her cut tee shirt and rolled her eyes. I felt as if I was an outsider, intruding on the their family ritual. I knew that most days I would eat with Cornelia or the other field hands, hopefully I would be more comfortable there. I would do anything to feel a little more at home, but I wasn't supposed to be comfortable. After all, this was my punishment.

After breakfast, I loaded up the truck with crates of produce while July watched. She offered to help but I insisted I could get it done quickly, which I did. There was plenty of boxes of fresh tomatoes, lettuce, strawberries, cucumbers, corn, and watermelons, which I learned were the farm's main crops.

 I turned to see July looking at me, lips pursed. She looked puzzled.

  "What?" I asked her, closing the back of the truck.

   "I'm just...trying to figure you out." She said, the same curious expression on her face. I shrugged as she walked around  to the passenger side and handed me the keys. I held them in my hands for a long time before looking up at her.

 "Oh, I forgot." She whispered, taking the keys from my blistered hands and brushed past me to the driver's side and got in. I followed slowly, a little shaken up at the thought of driving again.

She drove us down to the store and parked the truck in the dirt parking lot.

 ”Come with me.” she said, walking towards the front of the store. I jogged a little to keep up with her.

“Shit!” she stamped her foot on the ground, causing a cloud of dirt to rise up around her brown leather boot. “It’s closed. Daddy won’t be happy." She frowned, her bottom lip curling over.

 ”I’m sorry.” I said sympathetically. The way she said it made me think he beat her or something, she sounded small and scared. I really hoped that wasn’t the case. 

 ”That’s okay. That gives us more time to ourselves. Come on, I'll show you around” She laughed and did a little dance, skipping towards the truck, all hints at sadness were gone.

I figured she would show me the main roads in town and where to find common things like the store and the post office, but she lead me over two long rolling hills with nothing around. I figured there was another part of town past them, but she skipped along to another dirt path with a bunch of dead trees and grass.

 ”I know what you’re thinking…” She said, it was the first time we’d spoken since we left the market. “…This isn’t actually the scenic route, but we’re almost there.”I laughed lightly, the first time in weeks that I wasn't faking laughter. 

 ”Oh so you do have a soul!" she giggled. I gave her a look and she quickly continued, covering her tracks. "I mean, you just don’t seem to be very…how do you say… Well you just seem kind of emotionless.” She bit her lip, looking a bit nervous, as if she had offended me.

  The thing is, I used to be a really easy going guy. I had a good amount of friends, I always had plans, I was on the soccer team. I had it pretty good, but then after the accident, and the trial I shut everyone out. I hadn't talked to my friend Hunter or my family or any of the other people that didn't seem so significant after I had...killed someone.

 ”I guess I’m just getting used to being here. It’s nothing like home.” It was more than I had said to anyone in the past few days. 

 ”Well Mister Grumps, I’m pretty sure you can get acquainted with the way we do things in Indiana fairly quickly." she laughed. It was quiet for awhile while we walked.

 A few minutes later a beautiful lake came into view, it had a stunning view of the small town, and rolling hills could be seen for what seemed like miles. It was breathtaking.

"We're here," July breathed.