I sat in the doctors office looking down at my lap. I was still taking in the news I had just received. It was so unreal. If the doctor hadn’t shown me the results I wouldn’t have believed him. I felt nauseous again and I ran into the bathroom spilling the contents of my stomach into the toilet. I wiped my mouth and then the tears that had formed in my eyes. I looked down at my still flat stomach. The thought that a baby was forming inside terrified me. I thought about Kimi. One night caused this, one stupid night. A night that I don’t even remember. I gathered my things and made my way out to my car. I pushed my sunglasses down on my face and slid into my Ferrari. I fought back the urge to cry again. Kimi was with Minttu and he was happy. I couldn’t ruin that for him. I made the decision that I wouldn’t tell him. Hopefully I wont be showing much by the end of the season, and then I can just quietly have my baby and then live with my grandfather and raise it out of the eye of the media. I frowned when I remembered that I had to tell my grandfather. I took the long way home and once I arrived I didn’t rush up to see him.
Finally I went to my grandfathers office. The door was closed. I knocked softly, but received no answer. I quietly opened the door and looked inside. The lights were off which was a surprise, he is almost always working. I then went to see if he was in his room. I knocked on the door to his bedroom and I heard him call for me to come in. I took a deep breath and opened the door.
“Heidi. What are you doing back so early?” he looked at his watch. “I thought practice 3 had just ended?”
“Yes, I wasn’t feeling well.” my nerves were in full force. My chest felt tight and my stomach has doing flips. I sat down on the bed beside my grandfather.
“Well do you need to see a doctor?” he placed a hand on mine and looked me in the eyes. I knew there was no point in beating around the bush. My grandfather would see right through it.
“That’s actually where I just came from.” I took another deep breath. “and I need to talk to you about what they told me.”
“What is it my darling?” he could tell I was nervous. “You know you can tell me anything.”
“I know grandfather.” I looked down at my lap. I felt like a whore.
“Don’t be afraid.” he encouraged me.
“I’m pregnant.” I blurted out before tears started to flow down my face. My grandfather sat there silent for a moment. The nervousness began to build within me. I had disappointed him.
“How long?” he finally spoke.
“Almost six weeks.” he nodded.
“Its Kimi’s of course?” he half asked half stated.
“Yes.” I said softly.
“It will all be alright.” He patted my leg. “How did he take the news?”
“I’m not telling him.” I looked away.
“Well why would you have a baby with him and not tell him?” my grandfather was making me nervous again. I knew my divorce to Kimi might come out.
“Because he is with another woman. And he is in love with her.” I chocked back tears.
“So you weren’t trying to have a baby?” he turned my face back towards him.
“Of course not. It was a mistake.” I was quiet.
“Heidi, no child is a mistake. I don’t want to here talk like that.” he said strongly.
“I didn’t mean it that way.” I responded quickly. “I know this baby will be a miracle.”
“Yes. So how did this happen?” his stern voice came back.
“Kimi and I were drinking.” I paused. I didn’t want to go on with the story, but I knew I had to. “We were on and up and were getting along great. We just kept drinking and it got out of control. The next thing I knew I woke up in bed with him… and had gotten married.” I felt so dirty. So ashamed.
“You are married to Kimi?” My grandfather actually seemed happy. “Why is he with another woman?”
“We had the marriage annulled… I had the marriage annulled. Grandfather I wasn’t ready. I couldn’t be married to him. I just wasn’t ready. And now I’ve hurt him ad he wants nothing to do with me. That is why he is with another woman.” I was relieving the awful memories. I could see the hurt in his eyes.
“Heidi, he would want to know about his baby.” My grandfather
“He doesn’t have to know.” I looked away.
“You know that’s not fair to him. You can’t keep a mans flesh and blood from him.” my grandfather wasn’t angry or rude, but he was telling me how he felt.
“He doesn’t want me. It is better if he doesn’t know.” I shook my head.
“I’m not going to make you Heidi, but you need to tell him. I think his reaction would surprise you.”
“I’ll think about it.” I said to appease him.
“I am proud of you no matter what. And I can’t wait to become a great grandfather.” my grandfather kissed me forehead. And with that I knew it was going to be alright. It might be hard. In fact I knew it would be hard, but I would make it.
A/n: please vote and comment what you thought about the chapter! I really appreciate feedback!!
