The War on My Shoulders...

Chapter XIII: Let Them Burn...

"Bliss? Fuck are you alright?" Someone shakes my shoulders and I wearily open my eyes. I let out a sharp scream and slap Sawyer across the face; it is a weak slap, my exhaustion making it impossible to put much force behind it. His eyes sharpen in surprise and his mouth hangs open.




Oh my god. It isn't the the thing. It is actually Sawyer. I cover my mouth in horror and nearly burst into tears right there. My chest feels hollow and every motion feels delayed. "What the hell was that for?!" He finally unfreezes and rubs his pink cheek. Then he narrows his eyes, "Who did that to you?!"




My vision flickers blearily and I flinch back as his hand comes towards me. His face softens and he brushes a stray strand from his face. "RICKY!" A girl's high pitch voice calls out and suddenly a tall brunette with wide tan eyes appears. "Oh Ricky! I got worried when I couldn't find you. Ready to go get some breakfast?" She is bouncing on her feet but stops when she sees me. "Oh. Hello."




Sawyer hasn't even glanced at her, still intently examining my cheek. "Hi I am...Grae." She doesn't even bother to give me her own name. Feeling hollow and out of place, I struggle to stand up. Electric hands help me up, even gentler than usual; I wish now more than ever I could see him. "Um...you should go Ricky. I will catch a ride with Jacob." Before he can reply I wobble away on my heels towards the house. People, bottles, cigarette buds and empty cups are strewn across the yard in a mosaic of after party disaster. My lips feel swollen from the forced kiss last night. My chest feels empty, my entire body weak and light.




What the hell was that last night. Why do I feel so...weak.




"Jacob?" I examine the passed out people on the first floor, searching for Samuel. Then I weakly take the stairs, having to step over a girl with bright pink hair...where are her clothes? I shake my head in disgust and start going through the rooms, seeing more naked people than I would prefer.




"Grae??" I turn to see Sawyer rushing towards me, his face flushed; I can't help the flare of panic that lights my hollow body. His image still makes me scared, instinct overwhelming logic. "Why did you run off?? And what happened to your face? I searched for you last night. I was worried."




"I tripped and it seems like you weren't too worried," I offer a smile and turn to the next door to jimmy it open. "Where in the world is your brother?"




And there he is in all of his Samuel glory: wiggling back into his jeans, two feminine lumps on the bed behind him, a lit cigarette hanging precariously from his lips. He holds up a finger beside the cigarette and finishes getting dressed. Then we all walk back through the darkened hallway to the staircase.




"That was a great party." Sawyer grunts in agreement and I side glance at him, remembering how that creature took his image. And then kissed me. And nearly killed me.




~~~~~~




I lean my forehead against my arm and tilt the menu up to read it. "So you just fell? And bonked your cheek?" With a grunt of agreement I tilt the straw contraption I have created down to my lips; I have stuffed three straws together to create one long straw. "Let me see it again?" Sighing I lift my head back up and allow him to tilt my face to examine the dark purple bruise on my cheek.




"Want me to kiss and make it better?" Samuel grins wolfishly and winks.




"Not with that mouth. I don't even wanna know where it's been," Sawyer chuckles with me and releases my chin. "What are you two gonna get? I can't decide." I return my head to my arm and scan the tilted menu. "I was thinking the pancake, eggs and bacon grand slam?"




They both nod in response and we order, the petite waitress rushing off to please the handsome boys. "And you're sure it doesn't hurt?" I continue to stare at the salt shaker, trying desperately to ignore the bird that is beating itself to death against the window.




It's not real.




Pick the one with the white wings.




I wince as the bird makes an especially hard thump and focus harder on the menu words. "Bliss are you alright?" Sawyer nudges my elbow and pulls a leaf from my hair. That's what I get for passing out on the ground.




"Of course. Just really exhausted." Another splatter of blood fills the window but I refuse to look at the bird straight on. It's fake. It's not real.




"You do look a little pale." He rests a hand to my forehead and frowns, his dimples deepening. "You feel really cold. You're shivering! Sam give me your jacket she is quivering!" Samuel passes over his weathered jacket and I shrug it on, melting into it's warmth. It smells like cigarettes.




The waitress returns with our food and her award winning smile. The bird in the corner of my eye slams into the window one last time and then stops. Assumedly it's dead.




It's not real.




"Thank you." Even the act of lifting my fork exhausts me. "This is delicious." I wolf down the entire meal in record time and then snuggle deeper into the borrowed jacket. Taking a sip of my coffee leaves me nearly comatose and I continue to stare at specific things to avoid glancing at the window.




It's not real.




Focusing on the pepper shaker I idly tap my fingers on the table, simply to keep myself from passing out. "B?" I intently stare into Sawyer's eyes, counting the flecks of green in the aqua. "Would you like my bacon?" I nod weakly and munch on it.




"Would you like more coffee miss?" Again I nod without looking up. Then I glance at my cup and watch as she pours something red into a cup. A talon and claw float to the top of the liquid and I raise my head in a sluggish motion. Then I let out a single ear piercing scream.




The waitress is staring down at me, head cocked to the side. Her bright pink eyes, like that of the bird, are surrounded by ashes and she leans closer. With a soft and terrifying voice she whispers, "Let them burn."




And then I scream again.