The Journal of a person...

I thought I would make a journal. I have feelings, but I feel like no one will understand them, but God, so I decided to just let them flow on to my hands on the keyboard and on to this digital version of my befuddling conscience. I am sorry if some things disturb you, it's my life, and this is the journal of a person. By the way, My name is May. That MAY [see what I did there? No? Okay then...] be important info...

April 27th, 2014 12:16 A.M

I won a HOPE award and the ceremony was Thursday. My grandparents came. Normally things would be all hunky-dory, but my parents and my grandparents are in a disagreement. At least I think that's the word to describe it... My grandma has a substance addiction issue, and my mom wants to help her get un-addicted, but my grandma is refusing her help. My parents always talk about it. I understand they are worried about her, I mean I am too, but my mom is always saying to let it go, but just...can't. It's her mom. She wants to make sure she is okay. I feel like I have to play the role of the counselor. I have to be the mediator. I am just a person. I make mistakes too. I just hope one day my family can just be at peace. I just want peace. Serenity. I know that it's normal for families to have fights and issues, I just hope we can come to a solution. I keep praying to God. I know he can do something. I just wish I felt more useful in these situations. This kid at school told me to climb under a rock and die. That is exactly how I felt when Gus dies.... random moment. I really don't care what he says to me, but after a while, things start getting to you. I made myself promises.

>Don't let others words affect me

>To never wear makeup

>Never dye my hair

>To always be an original

But, with the way society is, it's hard to keep these. I do, but society doesn't like us to have our own statements, but I shoved that in its stupid face and said HA. You should do that too. This may be a crappy journal, but it makes me happy. I hope you know I love you! I think that's enough for a night...

May#SSB