Domed. (Previously Pageant To The Death)

F O U R - Becoming a Woman Is Hell

F O U R – Becoming A Woman Is Hell

"Congratulations, honey, you are now a woman! You are eighteen!" My mother kisses me on the cheek, leaving a lipstick stain. I have only just woken up and am in the kitchen making breakfast. All we have to eat here is bread, fish and bird (pheasant), occasionally eggs. Rich people buy Beef and Pork, but we are average. Not rich, not poor. I decide stock up on bread, keeping up with my vegetarian decision. I can't bear to think of eating a poor, innocent animal. I wish I could at least have cheese or butter with the bread, but that is also afforded by rich alone.

I stride across the shining marble floor of the middle-sized kitchen to the metal cupboards that I know contain food. "You say that like it's a good thing," I mutter, opening the doors and piling my plate with bread. I want to take my fair share before my siblings leave me with nothing, regardless of the fact that it's my birthday. Food is food and the occasion doesn't change that.

Mother, who is standing behind the large dining table near where I had previously stood, sighs at me. "Do you always have to be so problematic?"

I settle on the better option of ignoring her rather than replying.

 "Come on; don't make your birthday worse for yourself," Drew, one of my brothers, says. The doors are so silent that I never hear anyone enter. I'd gotten my food just on time, because it wasn't long before the kitchen started filling.

"So you're no more a girl that can come play with me in the meadows?" Adrian, my oldest brother, whispers to me. Some type of meadows they are. I've read about real meadows with real flowers and sometimes little streams. These 'so-called meadows' are just fake grass and a couple of fake trees. The fake grass is itchy and bothersome, but it's all I've got. Adrian and I used to run down there and play since there were very few people.

"Shut up, Adrian, you know playing is illegal!" Mother snaps. Adrig says playing is what leads to bullying. Children used to play with certain children and leave others out. Playing is also banned because children used to get hurt a lot and wouldn’t do enough work because they were playing.

"Happiness is illegal," I mumble. I always mumble my thoughts, too afraid to say them loud, but too confident to not say them at all. I turn to Adrian. "What do you mean? You became a man three years ago, I'm only a woman for the first time today. That's not fair!"

"I'm just teasing you, happy birthday!" He kisses me on the cheek then hugs me but I push him off jokingly claiming he smells.

The rest of my family shuffles into the dining room for breakfast, wishing me a happy birthday as they walk past. Soon, all my eleven brothers and sisters are sat around the table, with my mother on the end. Father isn't here. He's only home for dinner, he's never home any other time. I shove all thoughts of him away as I remember why.

"Gift time!" Mother cheers when we are all done eating. The table is cleared in less than a minute with the new Adrigator father bought.

After receiving six various hair accessories (jewellery is not allowed, so people think the best thing to give to a girl is hair stuff), a ball from Adrian (which mother immediately confiscates, shooting him a death-glare), four mirrors (people here are incredibly vain) and in secret a real flower from Riley - my favourite little sister (a daisy, she said her teacher was displaying to her class how a real flower looked as they'd never seen one, and after class was dismissed Riley stole it. I gave her a high five).

When all the present giving is done, mother drags me to her room where we both sit on the bed.

"You are eighteen now," She tells me as if I still hadn't grasped that. "That means you have to go to the Adrigen calling."

"Adrigen? Mother!"

"There is little chance of you being in Adrigen, but you must go nevertheless. If you are not present, they will find you and kill you. So, darling, you must go."

I sigh, knowing all too well that her words are true. At birth, Adrig puts a chip into the back of your neck that can track you. If you are not born in the hospital, your parents must take you there, or else you won't get food. They put it deep into the back of the neck, where if you try and cut it out the result would be death.

Everyone is given food weekly, enough for their gender and age. Most families, ours included, put all the food together as one and separate it into portions for seven days. The last to wake up and eat is left with the tiniest shreds of crumbs. At work and school, everyone is given food for lunch. Boys are taught to hunt and whatever they kill, they may bring home to their families. Because of this, there are never any animals for them to kill except birds.

Adrig doesn't really pay attention to everyone's tracker, unless they skip school or work. With that and Ingrid's reassurance that the tracker signal shows us still at the boat, it's safe enough for David and I to visit her.

"Daring, you'll be alright," Mother squeezes my hand and sends me a tight smile. With all these thoughts running through me, I'd forgotten her presence. I don't even bother responding, I just shake my head. I'm talentless; we both know that if I'm in the Adrigen, I'm as good as dead.

When mother has left, Riley squeezes in. Just seeing her puts a smile on my face. "Hey, little scamp."

"Ann?" She holds out her tiny hand, and in her little fingers is a ball. With Tilly in mind, I pull her into an embrace and say how much she means for getting this. Who knows, maybe David and I will learn some games with a ball from a storybook.

When I pull her away from my body, I can't help looking into her seemingly innocent eyes. She's already turning into a dear little rebel, and I both love and hate it. Stealing the flower and now this ball, risking punishment for my happiness. When will she notice that she is my happiness?

I love it because it means one day, I'll be able to share Ingrid's garden with her. I'll teach her how to read, write and sing. I'll show her plants with vegetables growing on them. The bright and beaming flowers, ten times as beautiful as the one she stole. I'll show her Tilly and how real trees look. I'll teach her how life really should be.

But I hate it, because she's risking a lot without knowing what could happen to her if she is caught. I can't imagine her - so young, so beautiful - being tortured, screaming out and there's nothing for me to do, being forced into a dark lifetime of sadness. I can't bear the thought.

I can't imagine her where I am. Being in Adrigen. Possibly dying, or winning while others die. I can't imagine her being a woman. I want her to stay young and beautiful. I want her to be the apple of my eye forever. She has to live a life of happiness.

"Oh, Riley," I whisper. "Please, stop risking yourself for me."

"I just love seeing the smile you get when I give them to you."

"And I love seeing you unharmed!" I yell. I see her wince and sigh. I realise how unfair it was of me to shout at her. "Sorry, Riley, but you just don't understand what they would do to you."

"Okay, I'll stop Ann."

"Good, and promise me one thing," she looks up with curiosity swimming in her eyes. I smile at this, and cup her smooth cheek. I lower my voice, and lean in "Run away from here before you are eighteen. Becoming a woman is hell."