Three angels hugged me. That’s something I realized when I first started this essay. When I really think about that, all that comes to mind is: “Wow! God really loves me and cares about me.”
Hope comes in unique forms. For me, hope comes in a hug. How many hugs do you give a day? Do you even think what it means when you hug someone? What kept me going were 3 hugs. Not only were the hugs special, but so were the people who gave me them and the words they spoke as they hugged me.
The first hug was given to me by my teacher. My mom’s bunny had just died, and sad to say, I can’t cope with death real well. It freaks me out, to put it lightly. I remember going to school after my mom told me Soot died, in shock. It was a lot to comprehend. I got to school and I still hadn’t shed a tear. My friend walked up to me and asked me what was wrong and I just started crying. Then my teacher saw me and wrapped me in her arms and held me close. As she was hugging me, she kept saying over and over, “It’s ok, I’m so sorry.” It was how sincere her words were that made me realize that it was going to be ok and I didn’t have to be sad or scared.
The second hug was from my love-you-like-a-sister friend, Megan. I was so close to giving up. I remember I went up to her and said, “Megan, I’m not going to beat this.” It was the first time I had said it out loud, even though I had been thinking it for a while. Megan hugged me and said, “Yes you are. Yes you are. You’re stronger than this.” And the thing that I remember the most was how she didn’t let go.
The final hug was given to me by one of my school’s guidance counselors. I was talking to her and I was so scared that she was going to freak and refuse to talk to me. When I got up to leave her room, she said, “Karina, I’m going to give you a hug.” The last time a person hugged me voluntarily was 5 months ago in July. I felt slightly panicked. She wanted to give me a hug? So I said something like, “Why?” And she said, “Because you need one.” As she hugged me, she looked me straight in the eyes and said confidently, “None of this is your fault. The depression, the eating disorder, none of it is your fault.” When she told me that, as crazy as it sounds, I believed her.
Hugs are the perfect moments. They give you hope and comfort. Hugs come from people who are like angels. When you can’t see a way out, and you need it the most, but least expect it, God sends people into our lives to touch our hearts personally by giving us a hug. A touch of kindness, a touch of hope. Hugs show us that not only someone cares enough to say words to us, but that they care and understand enough to express them. I promise, that when you are struggling the most and you least expect it, God will send you an angel’s touch to heal you and to give you hope. It might not be a hug or even words of compassion, but you will get some kind of hope. The next time you think the end’s near and want to give up, look around for your angel’s touch. And if you don’t get it and start to lose hope, you’re not looking hard enough or you’re not seeing the full picture. Who knows, maybe God will give you the angel’s touch to put hope in someone else’s heart.
Karina
December 12, 2013
