Scattered Sanity (Sanvers)

Day Four.

(TW // Rape)

(This is a very emotional chapter. Reader discretion is advised.)

"Who do you love?" A furious roar accompanied by a fist to the stomach.

Alex's toughness was holding out, as she had been enduring these blows for what felt like forever, but she wasn't giving Rick any satisfaction. "Maggie Sawyer." She declared.

A vein pulsed angrily in the kidnapper's temple, his fury evident as his fists, decorated with purple bruises on his knuckles, clenched and released. "Just how damn stubborn are you?" Rick seethed, his leg lashing out and catching his victim in the nose.

The taste of iron was quick to flood Alex's mouth, blood spilling from her nostrils to her lips, which were parted in a weary smile. "Maggie was the first person I ever opened up to about my secret, and she was the person who finally got me to be myself. She means the world to me. I'll never forget her, no matter what." She managed through the blood infiltrating her mouth, her eyes steely and determined, sending a message that she wasn't going to give in easily.

Rick swiftly snagged a handful of Alex's dark red hair and tugged her head backwards, pulling on her scalp and exposing the skin of her neck. "There's only so much you can take, Alex. Everyone has a breaking point. Even you." He seethed.

"You're nothing but a sick terrorist. I've dealt with worse than you." Alex grumbled. Her arms were sore and exhausted from being hoisted above her for so long, but Rick hadn't undone the bindings on her wrists for as long as she had been here, so she was forced to deal with the persistent aches that pierced at her muscles.

"Be careful what you say." Rick warned. "I can do so much worse than just violence." He threatened, yanking her head back again and tightening his grip on her locks of hair. His infuriated gaze broke from Alex's, and he redirected his attention to her vulnerable flesh, attaching his icy lips to her neck.

Alex reflexively tensed, her heart rate picking up as panic began to settle in. She knew that Rick was right, this was a more destructive alternative than beating her, and it was the one form of torture that she was genuinely terrified of. Being stripped of her dignity without her consent would dirty her soul, and she would never be able to cleanse it, knowing that someone had violated her. She felt his mouth trail down towards her collarbone, planting kisses as he moved. Every time that Alex flinched, she received a jerking pull on her scalp, so she tried to stay as rigid as possible.

Rick kissed along the redhead's collarbone, then along the center of her chest, all the way to where her black v-neck ended. Pausing momentarily, he reached towards his back pocket and retrieved a switchblade, flicking the knife into view. He brought the point to Alex's waistline, barely touching the fabric of her shirt.

"What are you doing?" Alex asked, already envisioning how she would have to play off being stabbed as if she was immune to the pain.

(**Graphic depiction of rape below**)

Her captor chuckled to himself. "Oh, Alex, I'm not going to cut you. But," He used his free hand to pinch the hem of her shirt between his fingers. "I will cut this." In a single fluid motion, Rick drew the blade upwards, slicing a line straight through her shirt and breaking through the collar. 

Alex gasped, horrified at having this much skin visible. She shut her eyes as forcefully as she could when she felt Rick's calloused hands stroking her midsection, brushing over her toned abdomen with feather-like touches.

"You're beautiful." Rick murmured, kissing her jawline. He hooked a finger under the strap of her sports bra and ran down the length of it. After that, both of his hands went to the elastic support under her bra, lifting it from her chest and bunching it up at the top of her sternum. His eyes widened, scanning over her form greedily. 

"Rick, stop this." Alex pleaded, fear consuming her. 

Rick looked up. "The only way for you to get me to stop would be to admit that you don't actually love your so-called girlfriend."

Alex opened her mouth, but no words came out, as her mind was attempting unwind this conflict that she had been presented with. She knew that she loved Maggie with all of her heart, and there wasn't a shred of doubt in her mind, but she was extremely panicked over what Rick was planning to do to her. How did she even know that Rick would hold true to his word, and he would leave her alone if she lied? If Rick continued, she would have suffered two losses. Maggie had just about saved Alex from the tumultuous and puzzling life she had been leading up until they met, and Alex could not let her down by dishonoring her memory. No matter what, even if Maggie thought that she was dead, Alex was sure that she would never give up searching, not until she had found an answer, and she knew that she couldn't give up either. She had shared the happiest moments of her life with Maggie, and there was no way that she was going to throw that away. "I love Maggie Sawyer, and nothing you can do will change my mind about that." 

Rick's eyes narrowed in a glare. "You have made your choice. And now it's my job to make you regret that decision, so you don't make it again. Hopefully you learn from this mistake." With that, he grabbed her chest, raking his nails over the sensitive flesh.

Alex clamped her mouth shut to muffle the scream that threatened to burst from her throat. Lines of fire blazed where the scratches were sporting their bright red color on her skin, and she could feel her dignity ripping apart while Rick kissed where he had left his abrasions. She squirmed, kicking out her legs and thrashing, inadvertently catching the left side of Rick's face with her foot. She froze, surprised that she was able to make contact, but also because Rick's head snapped up, fury illuminating all of his features, an expression that could shake anyone to their core.

"You did not want to do that, Alex." His voice was strangely calm, but there was undeniable malice laying behind it, an evil intent stronger than ever. Without warning, Rick dragged the rest of Alex's clothing off, leaving her completely naked. 

The redhead was riddled with goosebumps as the cool drafts of air hit her bare body. Her lower lip was snagged between her teeth, an attempt to keep her grief in. She refused to watch, averting her eyes, her breath quick and shallow, panic evident. Never had she imagined that she would be a victim of this unspeakable crime, yet here she was, helplessly trying to block out the noise of a belt buckle rattling as it made contact with the floor. A mantra repeated in her brain, stay strong, stay strong, stay strong. 

A scream ripped free from Alex's throat, raw and anguished, the scream of someone who was losing everything, whose world was collapsing around them and leaving nothing but rubble, piercing deep into the soul of anyone listening. It was worse than anything she could have predicted, her insides being torn apart and ravaged unwillingly. She was crying hard, choking on her own sobs and flailing with every scrap of energy in her, the skin of her wrists peeling away while she struggled against the ropes binding her, all to no avail. 

"Maggie!" Alex screeched hysterically, knowing that it was impossible to reach her. "Maggie, HELP ME!" 

(A/N: That was easily the toughest scene I have ever had to write, so I don't blame you if that was tough to read. I hope you stick around, because we're just getting started. And don't worry, there will be Sanvers in this story.)