Questions: Why?

4

She

"What we have to eat today?" I ask Jordan "I have no idea" he says "Where are the others?" "You mean where Nash and Mali" I say and looks at him "Yeah. Where are they?" "We're behind you!" Mal yell. "Hey! Where have you been?" I ask Mal, her smile says everything, she was with Nash. "Let's go" Nash say "I'm waiting to someone" I wish that they would leave me alone "We'll wait with you!" Nash says, I look for Tom, I promised him to sit with us "Hey Skyler" he says "Hey Tom, I just wondered where are you" he smile and look down "I've been with my brother, he doesn't feel well, so I was with him until I saw what hour it is" he say "Guys, this is Tom he came today with his brother Liam" I say, Nash getting closer "Nice to meet you man!" he shakes his hand "This is Mali, Jordan, Nash and me" he smile "Let's go" Jordan say.

"What is the best thing to eat here?" Tom asks "My advice, don't eat anything" I say, I sit between Jordan and Tom, I don't want to be close to Nash, it's not that he and me aren't friends anymore because of Mali, it's just that I don't want her to hate me, she is that she's only girl friend that I have, the rest of them are boys. "I should've listened to you, I hope that it isn't taste like it smells" Tom say, he holds with his spoon the soup that he took "It does" he looks at me helpless. At the other side of the table Nash and Mali are sitting alone, sometimes she whisper things in his ear then he smiles. I wake up "I done. Tom I'll see you tomorrow at sport lesson?" he nods "I'll go too right now. Bye! It was nice to meet you"

"They're nice" Tom is saying. I look out of the window, the corridor that before a few minutes was full with people, now empty. Tom lean on the wall next to the window "They trying to" "So what's the story of this place?" he asks "Story?" "Yeah, every scary school needs a story" he laughs "Right. My mother that was the principal before 14 years" "What happened to her?" "She got murdered" I say and look down "This place, where we are standing, was her favorite place. My father was standing where you're standing and my mother where I'm standing. I remember them" "And your father what happened to him?" he ask "Same end as my mother" he looks at me "I so sorry that I asked about it" "It's okay" he smiles, he tries to make me smile, when I look at him I see that his eyes are shining and that his smile is not going down from his face. "Thank you" he says "For what?" "I don't know. For helping me to fit in" I smile "No problem. You should go to your brother" he nods "See you tomorrow" I say.

I hear the door slamming. "We need to talk" Nash.

"What?" He is standing right in front of me, his hand deeply in his jeans pockets. "Why you're ignoring me?" he asks "I'm not!" "Come on Sky, I didnt get born yesterday. Something happened, tell me what I did wrong, don't do this shit that I need to guess" "Nash you did nothing wrong. I just giving you two space" "Space? Who said that I need space from you? You are my best friend Sky!! I don't need space, if it's mean to you that you should ignore me, so I don't need one" "But your girlfriend does" "Mali? She talked to you?" "No, never mind. That talk never happened, I'm going" "Sky" he looks at me with his puppy eyes.

I walk to my room, a million thoughts in my head, about Nash, what if he's right and I really ignored him the whole day? And why Mali trying to separate us? More like, why he saw it and I haven't? It feels wrong like something is very wrong behind any step that she has ever done.

Out of my room I see Mali's window. They're talking, and then the shadow that looks like her getting closer to him. I think that she kisses him. When I see them I think about how much I wish that I had someone like Nash that cares about me, that really loves me, and not faking it. Not like Jacob did for two years. I lay down; I look at the ceiling, it full with shining stars. I remember that before four years I stood here, to hang them. My mother used to say a lot of thing, amazing sentences, and beautiful words. My favorite sentence that she has ever said was: "If you feel lost and empty, look ahead to the sky, see how the stars all together and maybe you'll remember that you have never been alone"

And without noticing I started to sing, a song that my very dead mother used to sing. Tears go down my checks, until my whole face wet. The knocks on my door are saving me from having more tears. "Who is it?" I ask "Nash" I open the door, his face are wet just as mine "What happened? Come inside!" I say and whip my tears. I have never seen someone broken, and hurt as he looks like. He is sitting down on my bed, and I sit right next to him "We had a fight" more tears go down his face, have they fought because of me? Because of my words? If it is the reason, I wish I could take them back "What was the reason?" "She said to come to her room after dinner. She asked what you and I talked about outside, I asked her why she told you to give us a space and she said that you trying to steal me, and that you're an idiot, I said that she is wrong and she got closer" this moment, I thought that she kissed him, if she haven't, what she have done after I stopped to spy them? "She slapped my face, she tried to sorry, but I already walked away" I look at him; his right check is still red from her slap "She's the worst" I say "Why I did such a mistake? How I always choose the wrong one?" "Bad luck. But it'll get better" I hug him, I feel his strong arms hug my back, for a few moments too hard, but he felt that I can't breathe "I'm sorry" he say "It's okay" "Why you cried?" he asks "I thought about my dead mother" he looks at me sadly "You know what? No more tears!! Now lay next to me on the bed" he lay down slowly "What you planning to do in your little head?" "First, my head is okay, second you'll see very soon" I walk to the light switch and turn it off "Wow" he says, his eyes are staring at my shining ceiling "Yes, I done it a few years ago" I lay next to him. And we're staring at the lights, at the stars the whole time, until he fall asleep and I go to sleep on the very cold floor. But this day was worth it, all of it was worth those short moments with Nash.