Keeping Up With Lucy

p r o l o g u e

     This is a story all about how a simple girl named Lucy Mills, aka me, who turned out to be extremely good at picking up guys. Like really freaking good. I'd never had any, what some people would call "training" on pick-up lines or anything of that nature. It all just came naturally. One day, I woke up for school and all of a sudden, I was really smooth. Smoother than creamy peanut butter.

     However, our story begins long before my sudden smoothness. Well not that long before, since you know...only seventeen here. When I say long before, I guess I mean back in elementary. Back when ole' Lucy was just a young third grader -- I couldn't have been any older than eight. Third grade was when having a boyfriend or girlfriend was the thing, and if you didn't have one, then you just weren't cool. And ya know, that really sucked because I was never really popular with the opposite gender. Boys being boys, they preferred the more voluptuous girls, if you catch my drift. And me, well I was just flatter than a piece of plywood - and not one of the warped ones either. 

     While all the couples were holding hands, and kissing on the playground when the teachers weren't watching...I was sitting alone with a rock I named George. But, hey! Was I complaining? No not really. It would have been nice to be wanted by one of the boys at my school, but I was too smart for my age. I had done the math, (Geeky, I know.) and found that the average time span that couples lasted in the third grade was about five to six days. It would be better to wait until high school or college came around. Not gonna say I didn't try to get a boyfriend or anything, but nothing ended successfully.

     Soon giving up on the whole dating thing, I turned to school work and academics. Which I surprisingly didn't suck at. Pretty soon, I was ranked number one in my class my junior year. And there you go folks, all caught up on what happened before my 'talent' appeared!