T A K E A S T E P B A C K

1️⃣3️⃣T R E C E1️⃣3️⃣

My anger blinded me once again. I just saw him and went to try and kill him. Luckily, Synthia stopped me before I could do any extreme damage. I fucked up his eye too. I saw her brothers watching from their room windows as I left and I realized how much I fucked up. What if they end up like me?

I called Synthia to tell her to stay away from me and I swear I could almost hear her crying on the other side. Her voice didn't crack or change. I'm a danger to her. I can't keep doing this. What if I snap on her in this last week?

I'm moving away. She'll have to get over me at some point in time. She can't keep holding onto me like this. I'll keep on protecting her until I leave. Then, she'll have to let me go.

I got home and got in bed not even caring about what my mom was doing right now. All she did was sleep and to be honest that's what I wish I could do now. I took hella long naps today with Synthia up under me or wrapped around me and now I just can't sleep. It doesn't feel the same.

I'm gonna miss this girl I know it. I checked my phone again in what seemed like thirty minutes, but it was actually two hours. It was three in the morning and I stopped smoking.

"I'm gonna go check on Synthi-. I forgot I broke up with her. She must hate me," I said after getting up. I laid myself back down and managed to get an hour of sleep.

I woke up tired as hell, but I had to go to school. I had to protect Synthia. I walked to her lonely locker at the end of the empty hallway and it smelled strongly of bleach. Her locker had dent in it and some paint was chipped off.

I herd these little footsteps and I turned around and saw Ming walking toward me. He looked happy for some unknown reason.

"You and X are going to pay for what you did to me. Especially that hoe you guys are falling for," Ming said with anger in his eyes and he was starting to turn red. Then he just stomped off.

I saw Synthia walk over and she looked at me and ignored me.

"Baby I made a mistake," I said and she nodded.

"I did too," she said and I kissed her forehead, "I kisssd X," she blurted. I grabbed both of her shoulders and pulled her closer to me.

"You did what?", I asked in a loud tone. Synthia jumped and she swatted my hands away.

"My mom told me to help someone in the bathroom. I cleaned out his cuts then he kissed me."

"Synthia," I said and she looked down.

"I know you hate me," Synthia whispered and I sighed at looked at her, "Why are you here anyway? Didn't you want me to stay away from you?"

"That's the mistake I made. I can't stay away from you Synthia," I couldn't even be mad at her. She told me the truth about what happened. Synthia didn't wait or lie to me about anything. I can't find another one like her.

"I want you to be mad. That's the whole reason that I kissed him," she yelled at me. By now we have already missed our first period. I doubt that she cared.

"Please stop crying," I said. It hurt me to see her like this. These bandages on her wrists. Breaking down because of me. I kissed her in he middle of her sentence. I pulled away from her and walked off in the other direction. I'm just going home. I'm going to fly out early.

[X got jumped and he got knocked out. The guy who jumped him was Rob Stones friend and he got stabbed. And X dropped some lit ass music. "Off The Wall" ft. Ski Mask The Slump God. Yeah. Weird ass night last night]