Godless Girl

Chapter 5

Aurora's POV

Hope's hand continued to clutch mine as she sprinted through the trees. As our large tent finally came into view, she slowed her pace and turned to grin at me. After settling into the tent and pulling out our snacks, we both got out our phones to check messages. "No service," Hope groaned. "No internet." Disappointingly, I found I too had no service deep in the woods. I shrugged and said, "That's alright, we still have each other to talk to."

Stuffing half a clementine into her mouth, Hope nodded and smiled. Juice dripped from the corner of her mouth and I reached forward to wipe it away with my thumb. Her body visibly stiffened as I touched her face so I quickly retracted my hand and sat back. "You had a little juice," I explain. "You know, from the clementine." Hope's body relaxes and she mumbles, "Oh, thank you."

For the next 10 minutes we are quiet and eat without looking at each other much. I don't understand why the atmosphere has become uncomfortable and I am especially unsure why Hope seemed put off by me wiping her lip. Before it seemed as if she couldn't keep a shining smile off her face, but now she is reserved and shows no emotion. "Are you okay?" I finally ask. Hope sighs and doesn't look at me. "Yeah I'm okay, just tired all of a sudden." she whispers back to me. "Sorry I acted weird, I just- the rumors." I shake my head and turn away. People never seem to learn.

"So I make any physical contact with you and you think I'm some lesbo trying to jump your bones?" I nearly screech. Hope's head snaps up and she throws her hands in front of her. "No! I just- I just started thinking about them and- I'm sorry! I was-" she stammers and her eyes are wide as the moon, darting between mine and the ground. I put my hand to her mouth, "Calm down. It's just your nature to suck up gossip and believe it." Her eyes turn sad and I remove my hand.

Hope pulls her knees to her chest and rests her chin on them. "I don't mean to judge you without reason. Or offend you." she murmurs. I shrug and scoff. "It doesn't matter. It's not an insult to be called a lesbian." At this, Hope quickly meets my gaze and says, "Oh," she swallows. "I wish I had that kind of confidence in myself." I shake my head, frowning.

"But you see, you should have confidence in yourself. You of most people.  You're in a good place with your personal religion or whatever and you obviously have a good family with money. There's no point in caring so much about stupid things people say. The only reason I am more open to expressing my true opinion on life is because I know it doesn't matter in the long run. Hope, life is so short. But I suppose you believe in a Heaven to depend on. I think my life will just end." I take a breath and cross my arms.

My eyes begin to burn and I blink rapidly. Long arms wrap around my body and I fall into her like quicksand. Since when did I become so vulnerable? I feel a kiss on my forehead and Hope shushes me. "I hope your heart finds peace. I'm so sorry." she whispers in my ear. I press the heels of my hands into my eyes and Hope pulls me to arms length.

"I lost my mother a few years ago," she starts speaking while holding my hands in hers and looking to the side. "I don't know what I would do if I didn't believe I could see her again, you know? I need to go to Heaven and see her again." Hope's voice breaks and I hug her again quickly. "I understand." I tell her.

Hope's arms entwine around me once again and I lay my head against her golden waves. We sit together until we both slip into dreams and miss the passage of the day. When we awake, it's past dinner time by half an hour. Just as I stretch my arms and groan, a persistent beeping sounds from outside and I see the radio flashing. I scamper out of the tent and grab the radio, holding down the button. "Yes? Hello? Hope, are you there? Hello?" a crackly voice jumps from the radio. "This is Aurora, Hope is in the tent. Sorry we missed dinner, we um..." I look around and clear my throat. "We lost track of time after we started collecting firewood and ate in our tent." I say to Father Gabriel.

There is a moment of silence before Father says blankly, "Please allow me to speak to Hope." I retrieve her from the tent and she begins whispering into the radio as I stand to the side. "Yes I'm safe, we're fine. Just settling into the wilderness." I hear her hiss. Eventually she hangs the radio back up in the metal box and turns to smile at me.

"Want to dance around a fire?" she suddenly squeals. "I brought a mini speaker so I can play music." I smile back at her and shrug. "Sure, why not?" I say. We go through the routine of stick collecting and hole digging again to build our fire and toss a match in. Hope plugs her phone into a speaker and balances them on a log together. Old alternative rock fades into the woods around us and the sun's soft peach glow fills the air comfortably. Hope begins to dance and spin around the fire. I watch her cheeks turn pinker and her blond hair swings around them. She grabs my hand and skips in a large circle with me.

Hope moves her arms and hips and laughs with me for the next several songs. She breathes heavily and pauses before a familiar song comes through the speaker. I Love You So by The Walters plays louder and the corners of my lips reach my ears. Hope sees me smiling and pulls me into dancing position, her hands on my shoulders and mine on her hips. We giggle and step bouncily to the song. I grab Hope's hand and raise it to twirl her and pull her back to me quickly.

The song slows and fades out until Hope and I are left inches apart, eyes sparkling and cheeks sore from laughing. "You're not as bad as everyone seems to think." she says quietly. I chuckle and say, "Yeah I'd say the same about you." Hope smiles and says nothing else. "So," I clear my throat and step back slowly. "That was fu-" and suddenly Hope's hands are chains around my neck, holding me to her lips.

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special thanks to @noendhouse for voting on the last chapter! I appreciate everyone reading this <3