What A Kiss Is

Chapter Fourteen

Fourteen

Dad puts his arm over me as I stumble out of bed in the morning. Amber’s awake and chatting with her mom.

“Happy Birthday,” he whispers.

I nearly double over. She promised. My birthday. I’m supposed to be in Paris today, celebrating eighteen.

“I…uh…” I turn and go straight back to my room.

Dad follows, closing the door behind him and making the air hard to breathe.

“Antony?”

I put a hand over my face, enough deep breaths will make it go away, push it away.

“What’s going on?” he whispers.

“She promised she’d be home by my…” But if I keep going, I won’t be able to stop the tears.

He sits next to me on the bed, resting a large hand on my back. Any comforting now will just make things worse. “Sorry.”

“We’re all sorry, aren’t we?” I blow a breath out as I stare at the ceiling. “I’m okay. I’m fine. I just…”

“We’re ignoring this one?” Dad asks.

I don’t meet his eyes. “Yeah. We’re ignoring this one.” And maybe every one that comes after it.

- - -

“Son of a bitch!” I slam my laptop closed. I thought I’d take my newfound adulthood and do something grownup like sort email, but that was a stupid mistake.

Three sets of eyes are on me. My hands are shaking and my breath’s coming hard. “Some stupid asshole who didn’t even know Mom is writing a biography.”

“Unauthorized,” Dad says.

I nod.

“You could pick someone to do an authorized one, so you’d have some say as to what goes in there,” he suggests.

Amber’s eyes are wide and on me.

Great. I’ve probably just scared her away, too.

“You could do it,” she says. Her voice is quiet, soft, tentative.

“I couldn’t do her justice.” And how would I even be able to start? All the stuff I’ve been cramming down starts to roll around inside me, but there’s no way I’m going to stand inside this stupid boat with three sets of eyes on me while I cry over my mom.

Amber stands up. “Let’s get out of here. Get off the boat.”

My shoulders relax. “Sounds perfect.”

Let’s run and never look back. Leave it all in the dust. Mom’s promise, her stupid decision to go to some other third-world country, and my birthday.

- - -

“This break from the boat may kill me.” I try to laugh as I follow Amber up this never-ending trail to a watchtower she says we have to climb. A few hours off the boat, her having no idea it’s my birthday, and me not wanting to tell her, means that we just are. We’re just together, and it’s exactly what I need.

“Wimp.” She laughs and keeps moving at the same impossible pace.

Now, I’ve always worked out in gyms, but this is different. This isn’t sets and running. This is prolonged uphill torture.

“It’ll be worth it.” She’s grinning as she turns to face me.

That smile hits me in a million different happy places. I don’t know what the hell I was thinking needing to talk to Hélèna. Right now, this is enough. I’d love it if it was more, but this is enough.