Falling for Imperfect Clowns

Falling for Imperfect Clowns Chapter 6:

Chapter 6:

“I hope Sophie’s alright in there.” Emily said.

“I should have never left her alone with that high school boy! What if something happened and I wasn’t there to help?” Mr. Hall complained nervously.

“Jack, calm down! I’m just as anxious as you are but you have to start trusting people a bit more.” His wife calmly held his hand for comfort.

“Louis is good to her, Mr. Hall. He never hurt Sophie whatsoever. I would have been the first one to say something if he wasn’t good enough.” Emily sipped her hot chocolate. She never liked vending machine drinks. They always had this funny taste but it had to do.

“Well, that’s good—you make it sound like my daughter is dating this boy…” Mr. Hall observed.

“Ah—Oh, really?” She chuckled nervously. Sophie hasn’t told them yet, She thought to herself. “It’s just how I said it. She knows your rules.” She smiled and sipped her chocolate again.

“Emily?”

She turned to face the person that had called her.

Niall stood behind, smiling; he quickly closed his mouth, hiding his teeth. His face changed.

“Yes?” Emily mirrored his uncomfortable expression.

“Will you…um…do you mind? —Uh…” He paused.

She could see the other boys in the other table looking embarrassed for him. “Do you prefer to go out? So we can talk?” Em suggested. She could feel the weight of Mr. and Mrs. Hall’s stare.

The air was cold out of the hospital. It almost seemed like it was about to rain.

“Emily…” Niall began. “You know how prom is next week already?” His cheeks flushed.

“Yes.” She smiled, waiting to hear what she wanted to hear.

“Will you…ah…I was hoping that maybe…you could help me find a date?” he slightly frowned.

“Oh.” Em felt like yelling but she knew there would be time for that later.

“I mean—yeah…” He looked down. “I need a date and I was hoping you’d help.” Niall said flatly.

“Well,” Emily felt completely humiliated. She had already pictured the perfect scene when he’d ask her. Unfortunately, now she became the wingman. She recalled that moment in the hallway when she and Sophie ditched detention. He was right behind her. The look on his face when she told him she’d loved him back would have kept her smiling for years. She wondered why he didn’t just ask her. Did he really love her? If he didn’t, then what was his big confession about? Emily couldn’t think anymore. “I’m sure the boys know a few girls. Ask them if you want.” She said coldly, and walked away.

“Um—No! Wait!” He called after hesitantly.

“Yes?” Even she found her tone rather harsh.

The look on Niall’s face…

That’s all that registered in her mind. His beautiful eyes, now filled with water, used to be the eyes she used to love looking at everyday. They were the same eyes that looked back at her when he said the three most important words she needed to hear from him. Those same words drowned in those tears.

“Nothing.” He looked down and felt everything about her walk away.

He sat in his car staring blankly at the steering wheel.

“Niall?”

“Mmm…” He was barely in the mood for talking. He knew Louis only wanted to help but would he know what Niall was going through? He grew up with sisters and classmates that were girls. He knew how to act without sounding like a complete freak. He knew what to say and everything.

“What’s up? You were unusually quiet today.”

“I was just thinking.” He said flatly.

“About?”

“Em…I was going to ask her to prom—you know, like how we discussed.” He sighed. “And I screwed up. I know it’s been three days since but I just really can’t not think of it.”

“You know, I’m not telling you what to do, but…Emily… I saw her face when she walked into the hospital. I thought you were finally going to ask her. Apparently not.”

“I didn’t know what to do! One look from her and I’m crawling down looking for a possible word to use! I can barely think! Emily is the most amazing girl I’ve ever met and I just wish it wasn’t so hard to talk to he!” He sulked. “The look on her face when I blew it. She’ll never talk to me again. I love her.”

“Then tell her.”

“I already did that,” he confessed.

“Then what could possibly go wrong!” Louis gave Niall a what’s-wrong-with-you-? You-already-bloody-have-her look.

“I’m just scared okay?” he tried to keep his voice down. “This is the first time anyone’s been that good to me, that kind to me, that gentle with me—That bloody everything!” He knew he started talking nonsense, but it was just Louis listening. Who cared? “Emily is so perfect. I could never be the ‘perfect’ boy for her if I look… if I look like…me.”

“Have you ever given the thought that maybe to her, you might be perfect?”

He didn’t answer.

They stopped in front on Louis’.

“You want to come in? My mum’s got good beef ready.” He smiled.

“Nah. I’ll pass.” Not even beef could distract him from the haunting memory of Em walking away.

“You must really love her…” Louis looked at him reassuringly.

Niall only nodded like a little boy who had just confessed he broke his mother’s vase. Feeling so afraid, but knowing it’s what’s right.

Drops of water started staining the glass.

The only line that played repeatedly in his mind was what Louis had said to him.

‘Have you ever given the thought that maybe to her, you might be perfect?’

He hadn’t thought of it that way, but it was too late now. It had been three days ago when Sophie had been pushed down the stairs and when he made the mistake of his life. He didn’t get the chance to talk to her since then. Every time he’d see her, she looked away, or moved closer to Sophie to continue talking.

He stopped at a red light.

No one else was in the car but him but it felt so cluttered and noisy as if he fit the entire math class in with him…including Emily. Why did he feel like she was there? Everywhere he went he always had something that reminded him of her.

He remembered the first thing he thought of when he and Emily were walking together, going outside the hospital. He pictured the most heartfelt proposal. He planned how he would say everything he’s been dying to tell her. The very first time he had told her he loved her didn’t seem like enough.

He rested his head onto the steering wheel when the thought hit him:

That first time he said he loved her…was it going to be his last?

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 End of chapter