Thuranduil's Heartless Obsession.

Chapter 20

Authors note: This will be entirely the memories and feelings she gave Thranduil before she left.

He was dreaming strangely of late he had been without dreams. Strange as it was he was riveted to what he saw before him. He was once more in the body of the woman. A silent observer.

"My dear do not go into Mirkwood. He is not an elf to trifle with and you will be slain for you troubles."

"Oh radaghast I love him he is my mate I can't help but at least watch him if I can't be near him." she giggled.

"Loriel you always come back so sad. You are only being hurt by him. Stay far from him."

"I know my friend but I can't stay away. Here give me your hand I will show you." she took the brown wizards hand and let him see??

"Ah well my dear that is truly a beautiful thing to feel. I but worry for you."

"I know. I shall return."

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She sat watching his wife whose belly was large and swollen with his child. She worried that he would not be there to see the files birth she was happy and saddened by it.

The queen suddenly collapsed and was taken away. Night was falling and she smellt death upon the air. She decided to stay close to the queen. She once more disguised herself as a maid and helped tend the queen.

An eternity of hours passed and she siphoned a bit of pain from the queen with every swipe of the cool rag upon her forehead. The pain was pure agony but she took it all the same.

When the birth didn't progress and the queen was close to dying she was left alone as a message was readied to be sent to him. He was far away.

"I am dying. My son will die and my husband will be alone" Lìril sad dejectedly.

"My lady what if you were given a choice. Your life or your sons? which will survive?" Loriel asked.

"My son. Save my son even if it means my own life."

"Very well. I am no elf but I am not your enemy." she allowed claws to grow and cut into the queens womb. she pulled the babe from the womb cutting he cord.

"Tell no one what you have done close the wound. Keep legolas warm until his father is here." his wife ordered.

Loriels thoughts was only on how she wished she could utilize her healing energy radaghast hadn't taught her it yet. She still vainly tried to close the wound with her blood and it worked but he queen was dead with a smile on her face.

She hadn't hated the queen despite the fact she had wished to be in her place. To take her place as his rightful spouse. She knew he had cared for Lìril and had wanted to make him happy.  Despite how much pain it had put her through.

When he had arrived he felt how much love she felt for him. She handed him Legolas. She waited to be asked to leave as was proper for a servant.

"You! You killed her! You had no knowledge to deliver a child! You are simply a maid not a midwife! Take her away and kill her!"

He felt all the emotional pain at his rage. She offered no explanation or plead for her life. She simply stood as he ran her through with his sword later that day. The emotional pain was far greater than anything he had ever felt.

She dug herself up from her grave and traveled the wide world once more. losing herself to battle. That was when her heart had hardened and she had lost her naivety. She no longer hoped for his love.

A thousand years with of watching him bed other women. A thousand years worth of waiting for him. A thousand lonley desolate years filled with tears beyond the count of memory. Sorrow pain hopelessness agony unrequited love.

A thousand years worth of loving him despite his heartlessness. A thousand years with innumerable hurts. The pain felt like he was dying. And what was worse was the numbing she did to countereact the pain and sorrow. The hardening of her heart.

A heart filled with immense pure love and innocents. A heart full of goodness and kindness. A heart he had torn a apart piece by piece. A heart with only the best of intentions and deeds. Now it was a black dead thing.

He felt all of it a thousand years worth of it all. horrific and tragic.

He rose up with a cry of pure horror. Guilt sadness horror and self hate. How could he have been so blind. How could he have rejected her so. How could he have been so cruel. she had never done him harm only good and how had he repaid her.

'what have I done?'

He saw the note and opened it. Reading it as tears filled his eyes. Such pain. oh what agony he felt. he now knew what true agony was. His eyes were wide open now.

"No this can not be! Loriel!"