A Thousand Eyes: A Novel of Elizabeth I

Chapter 4

There was something about hunting that washed away all troubles - temporarily, at least. Robin and I were glued to each others' sides as the pack raced over fences and under swooping trees after a snow-white hare, and we both knew that there would be whispers afterwards about the way our heads leaned close together as we talked during the quieter moments, whispers about how there were so many foreign dignitaries I could have been entertaining but in that moment, in that hunt, I only wanted Robin. Yet, there was something liberating about even this. Let them whisper, if they will, I thought. Let them whisper like petty schoolgirls.

We were galloping towards the hare, terriers snapping at ground level just ahead of us, and I the only lady - usually hunting was a sport reserved only for men, but then so was ruling England, so I decided not to be excluded from this sport - when one of the riders drew behind the pack. Usually this would not bother us, for it was not uncommon to be slowed down by a sudden ailment in the horse's leg or simply losing one's balance, but when we heard the lost rider yelling, Robin and I and others, too, certainly, turned around.

"What is it?" I hollered as I began trotting in the caller's direction.

"Have you found something?" Robin yelled.

We - Robin and I and a handful of others who had detached from the pursuit - found ourselves face-to-face with the duke of Feria.

"Look down," he said thickly.

Below our mounts' feet was a tangle of unmistakably red hair - red like mine, in fact. It was doll's hair, and I noticed with a pierce of fear that the doll in question had needles jutting out of all parts.

This was an act of black magic.

"Dear God," I breathed, and everybody crossed themselves.

"The astronomer!" Robin yelped. "Where is John Dee?"

"I will find him, my lord." A ratty-haired youth steered his horse towards the pack, cutting through the woods to catch up.

Silence hung like an executioner's sword above us. There could be demons near us, demons who had performed the dark magic required for such a horrid doll.

"It is nothing, Your Majety, I am sure," Robin assured me. "Only child's play."

"For the love of God, I hope it is so."

Soon everyone was with us, standing around this wretched doll as if it were a sort of wicked shrine. The astronomer said a blessing over the object to reverse the dark spell, but for the rest of the day I was left with a chill that constantly raked down my spine.

"You'll be all right," Robin said once more, and I tried so hard to believe him.

-----

Kat was unpinning my hair for the day when she saw my fist curled on the counter of the vanity. All my cosmetics were spread out, unevenly although the maids reorganized them every morning, jars of white face powder and shocking rouge.

"What troubles you?" she asked, and it was like I was seven years old again. What troubles you, Elizabeth, and I would tell her about how I longed to be at court again with my father or how I missed the years I could hardly remember, the years when I was "princess" instead of "lady". I would tell her how I sometimes wondered why God had made me a girl and not a boy, when so many awful things came of it. And to this she would say, practiced but with a distinct intimacy each time, It will all turn out as God intends it, don't you worry.