Living With Jared Padalecki

24/ would you love me anyway

The next day comes, and I feel like complete and utter trash. I have no reason for feeling this way right now, I just do, and I hate it. Jared noticed it, too, this morning when I sat eating breakfast with them, not uttering a word the whole morning, just sulking.

I most certainly did not want to bring this attitude to the diner with me, but there was really nothing I could think of that would improve it. The rest of the employees notice this too, my fake smiles and false interest in conversation. It's not until late afternoon when someone speaks up about it, catching me off guard; I thought I did a good job covering it up with my fake happiness.

"Let's get out of here," Jason says, surprising me when he comes up behind me, unties my apron, and pulls it off, then hangs it up. Turning around to face him, I give him a very quizzical and amused expression. "You're too upset to work. Let's take the rest of the day off." Knowing that there are already three other people waiting tables, we could leave right now and it would be okay. But what he has planned is beyond my knowledge.

"And do what?" I wonder aloud, causing him to smile a little, throwing me off guard and doing absolutely nothing to calm the knot forming in my stomach.

"Whatever you want," he replies. I furrow my eyebrows; no one talks to me like that, like I am a human being with opinions. I scratch the back of my head, still confused, but willing to give it a try.

* * *

Fifteen minutes later, we get to Jake's Rocks. Sure, the memory of running into the bullies there is not too pleasing, but it's still worth going there because of the beauty of it, and it will be even better since Jason is with me this time.

"Well, I didn't have you pegged for someone who appreciates nature," he says as I gaze around the woods, that seems empty except for us. I sigh in relief and ponder over what he said.

"What kind of person did you think I was?" I ask, taking a different turn on the subject. He shrugs, and I tug at the hem of my wolverine t-shirt.

"I don't know," he replies, but I don't buy it. I give him a pointed glare. "I thought you were one of those girls who puts herself before others." The smile fades, dropping to a frown, and my stomach twists. Why would he think that? What did I do that made him think that? "Most of the girls I meet are like that, and I guess I thought the same about you." I don't reply, just blink and look at the ground before me. "But, now I know better," he adds, as he kicks a small rock on the ground.

"How's that?"

"Well, now I think you are the most selfless person that I have ever met." I really have no idea how to take this, so I don't. I just wonder how he came to that. "You love kids, and you're good to other people, even though you don't have to be." Feeling heat creep up my neck, I shrug.

"It costs zero dollars to be a good person," I remark casually. "I can't afford to be anything else." He seems to think about this for a minute, and I start to worry that he suspects something else is going on. If he is, he shakes his head and forgets about it.

"So what's been bothering you today?" He asks, changing the subject, though it's still not one that makes me comfortable: my feelings.

I shrug. "Nothing really. Just one of those days." He gives me a look, one that tells me he is not buying it at all, but he respects my privacy and does not press any more, which I am grateful for. Instead, he plops down on a seat-like boulder, and I sit next to him, suddenly remembering something that I've wanted to ask him about.