Where He Belongs

"You met Lucien in the lunch line and now he is all that you can see." David stated calmly with a hint of sarcasm in his voice as he looked at Allen, studying him carefully. Almost curiously, but yet in a judging manner. Allen could not help but feel a little intimidated by the way David's gaze burnt into him. The truth in his words struck him hard. Because he knew that Lucien was being hunted by so many young men, like himself. And like him, they wanted to be noticed, to be seen, by Lucien. That was all he wanted. But as so many others, he was the one Lucien needed, not who he desired.

When he thought about his and Lucien's first meeting, he could not help but smile.
Allen had been wandering around all by himself, well technically, there had been a little tour through the school for new students and their parents-if they had decided to scatter along- which Allen had joined, not paying much attention really. The tour was guided by a rather pompous young man, who proudly showed off museum-like glass vitrines, claiming that the library was a church, and the contents of the vitrines were the sacraments. The vitrines contained historical, highly important texts such as works made by Shakespeare. 

When suddenly a stunningly handsome young man leapt onto a library desk with a book in his hand. "Let's hear a bit, shall we?" he said loudly, so everyone in the library could hear him, and of course, see him.

"On a Sunday afternoon, when the shutters are down and the proletariat possesses the street... There are certain thoroughfares which remind one of nothing less..." he continued as he took a lamp, got down on his knees and thrust the lamp between his legs. "Than a big cancerous cock!" He exclaimed with a moan. 

When suddenly a grumpy looking librarian clomped over and asked what the 'nonsense' was all about. She also stated that the book was restricted and Lucien said that it was why he had committed it to memory. The librarian, of course called upon security guards, who immediately rushed in for the poor old woman's aid, Lucien jumped down from the table, right in front of Allen and yelled "Alert the press! Tell them that Lucien Carr is innocent!" and fled out of the library, while an utterly stunned Allen watched him rush out, as he grinned to himself.

Allen laid in the bed in his apartment that he had bought, and thought about when he, Lucien and William Burroughs- Bill were actively writing on their New Vision. How they had worked frantically in David's apartment. Bill had removed the classic art and literature from David's bookcase and tossed them to Allen, who cut up pages of the books with a pair of scissors and handed the torn pieces to Lucien who nailed them onto the wall. It's all a frantic assembly-line. The wall was completely covered in the words.

Allen smiled fondly of the memory and traced his bed sheets with his middle finger and sighed. He slowly closed his eyes and let his mind slowly wander off to that time when they (he, Lucien and Jack) had stolen a boat in the middle of the night. The same evening as they had been in Jack's flat, when Allen had judged Jack's writing. The athlete, who also were a writer, did not even use any periods or commas! The younger man found that he was almost offended and angered by this fact. Allen did actually use periods and commas, and he found them extremely important, thank you very much. Anyway, back to his memory... He had slowly stood up in the boat, and read out his poem;

"Be careful.You are not in Wonderland. I have heard the strange madness long growing in your soul. But you are fortunate. In your ignorance. In your isolation, you who have suffered. Find where love hides. Give. Share. Lose. Lest we die unbloomed." He spoke slowly, just the sound of his voice and the water. Completely vulnerable, he sat back down and sighed nervously.
Lucien had just stared for a moment right at Allen when he realised that the poem was about him.