The Madman's Plight

Here I sit, alone, beaten, broken, ashamed...innocent, even, to an extent..My end is to come rather soon- within the next ten minutes or so- and I am fully deserving of such a fate, or so i am led to believe.I am "a cruel man". I have been called the devil. I have been compared to a demon.I am both of those and much more to most, and i cannot blame them for believing such, i suppose.Man should never try to play God under any circumstances.With my final moments occurring, my only regret is being as "evil" as I am. I am but a misguided soul who could have changed his ways, but, instead, allowed myself to be the horse upon which discovery and desire ride, tugging at the reins of my thoughts and swaying me to do their bidding.... I pray God forgives me of my sins, that he has mercy on my vile soul. If I am sent to hell, I cannot nor will I blame god for his judgement.I am fully deserving of my end..

Before i was dragged to this cesspit of a cell, I was somewhat of a scientist.I delved into the subjects of biology, anatomy, and life science, as I have always been incredibly fascinated with life, how it started, how It continues to start, and how it progresses. I would spend hours upon hours reading books on how the world was formed, and how anaerobic bacteria survived some of the harshest condition ever to be known, using the light of the sun to form oxygen though photosynthesis, thus forming the perfect environment for early life to develop and prosper and evolve. One particular item I failed to find myself fond of is the fact that if all life were to be destroyed, it could never occur again, as the Earth's atmosphere now contains oxygen; an element not present at the Earth's formation. The very gas on which we depend allows humanity one chance to survive, and each man one life, or so every bit of text I read stated.

I, however, yearned to challenge this quite depressing statement and prove the scientific acceptance and understanding of the rules of life incorrect! I aimed to place life back into the deceased,or perhaps create life with different attributes, making it possible for it to begin anew in the light of a new dawn, should humanity destroy itself. I aimed to be an innovator, a creator, a master of the elements and chemical balances that allow life to prosper. I yearned so badly to become a god of sorts...

I did not allow my Aspirations to become known until just under a week ago. My apprentice, Tycho, had proven himself loyal and trustworthy to me and I felt godawful about keeping my aspirations from him,but I continued to, as i feared he would perceive my statements as humorous rantings, and that he would not take them seriously.Truly, I was afraid he would find me to be a madman and that he would come to doubt my scientific credibility on any discoveries i made.Nevertheless, I eventually gained the courage to propose and explain my ideas, elaborating on each point I made to the best of my ability. My young apprentice thoroughly agreed with me, much to my surprise, and offered his aide in any way he could. If only he had known what I had in mind for him..

On the morning of August twenty-first, two days after my asking of his support and aid,my dearest apprentice was found deceased in his cottage by the police after they had received several reports from friends of him going "missing".At the rather young age of twenty-three, i say he was far too young and too bright to meet such an end, however, much to my chagrin, it had to be done. I despised myself for doing that to such a talented and understanding young mind, however,he did offer his help in any way, and in order for him to help me in my work, I needed him dead. My goal was to, with science, resuscitate him and bring him back to the world of the living, at least to an extent. With him recently deceased,I had to act fast. 

With some small experimentation done in my alone time, I had found that brain of a severed head could be brought back to life via a machine I had built the previous summer.The machine's original intentions were to have it act as a pump to test the erosive effects of water on varying types pipes after multiple waves an retractions. Once the urge to bring the dead back to life took me away, I began to think that the machine could be used to mock a mammal's heartbeat, and therefore it could pump blood through the veins of an animal, possibly bringing it back to the world of the living, as the brain only needs a steady flow of oxygenated blood to remain alive. I discovered this to be true once I tested my hypothesis on a deceased dog I found on my way to the market.