What we didn't know

Introduction

I fall into a sea of obscurity never seeing the consequences of my actions. The water isn't cold like I expect, rather lukewarm and almost inviting. Using what little energy I have left, I flail my arms and feet in order to get to the surface. I see the light shimmering through the luminous water. Gazing up, I am seeing the world in a brand new perspective. It's beautiful, something I've never before noticed.

    A pressure on my chest is building like if a ton of bricks were stacked into a neat pile on top of me. The restriction at first is slightly uncomfortable causing me to squirm. I fight the water, but I quickly realize it's useless. I allow it to drag me down further and further away from the fragment of light shining through. Knowing I'll never reach it, I settle for the comfort the water has to offer me. It'll never be what I want, but it's enough.

    The water has a tight grip on my body, and I don't dare to fight back. It's calm, clear, silent, still. My heart beat has slowed down immensely, and I'm beginning to find tranquility.  Just when I'm about to allow the water to devour me whole I feel a push that prevents me from completely sinking to the bottom. I fight against the current for the last time and I soon resurface from the water taking a breath of fresh air. My lungs are burning from the unexplainable, bittersweet sensation. 

    One moment I'm falling, falling hard and deep with no sense of direction. The next I'm struggling until I find the calm and I'm seeing the world in a different light. Then I resurface never being exactly the same as I was before.

That's how it felt to fall in love with him.