Completely Falling

Ch. XIV

We left the beach not long after that. Not only because I had a horribly bruised nose, but also because the boys and girls could definitely tell something was off between Niall and I. I don't think either of us were really thinking after that ordeal, Niall tripped, four times. Charlie had to repeat what she was saying for fifteen minutes before I was responsive. Maybe we were thinking too much. All I saw in my mind was Niall nearly kissing me on the piano bench, how it felt to wake up next to him, sitting with him at the campfire, the way he looked at me in this damned bikini, and the almost kiss we just had. But then my mind flashed to the notebook he had in Starbucks, the pictures of Marie that still lines the hallway, the little motes they wrote each other, the times I'd hear him cry for her when he thought I was asleep. Then here I came, confusing him, causing more heartbreak and becoming a burden to the others. 

I knew what had to be done. 

"Breezy, we're going out to grab a pizza, are you sure you don't want one of us to stay?" Zayn asked, grabbing the keys to the Rover.

"Really, it's fine!" I smiled. He shook his head, turning towards the door.

"Zayn?" I cried, my voice faltering. He turned towards me again. "Thanks. For everything." I said, trying not to cry. He walked over and hugged me, nodding. "It's a pleasure, for all of us, honestly. Call if you need anything." He said. 

I watched the car roll out of the driveway. After waiting a moment, I sprinted upstairs, grabbing my bags. Clothes went flying as I tossed clothes in, sniffing my sobs as the thick tears rolled down my cheeks. I tried to assure myself it was for the best. I reached for my glasses from the table, knocking Niall's small leather journal to the floor. I picked it up, running my thumbs across the indentation where he had shaped his name on the front messily with a pen. A worn Post-It note marked a page towards the middle. Against my better judgment, I opened it.

Day 337.

I don't miss you nearly as much as I did. I think I'll take down some of our pictures soon, I'm doing that well. I think Breezy would like that. I really care about her, Marie. I care about her like I do you, but not in a way where she is a reminder of you, but rather a reminded, y'know, that everything will be okay. For once in the past 337 days I feel okay. I'm glad I have her; otherwise I'd be a mess. It's about 3am now and she just fell asleep after our campfire with me. I hope all is well wherever you are.

I love and miss you,

                    Niall.

I sighed, pulling a page from the back of the journal and left him a long note. I grabbed my bags and walked into town. It was fairly busy for the evening. I walked until I found the train station I had seen on my way to the beach.

"Excuse me ma'am, is there a train to London connected here?" I asked. She raised an eyebrow.

"Hun, you're in the seaside of Scotland.  The closest I can get you is Sheffield, but from there it would be another two and a half hours." I shook my head.

"Of course, of course. That's about four hours from here, yeah? How much?"  I asked. She nodded, clicking on the screen with her long fingernails.

"About £40." I slid her the money, grabbing my ticket. The train came quickly, faster than I had expected. 

 I boarded quickly, shoving my ticket towards the woman and settling in my own cubicle, pulling the door closed and locking it, closing the blinds to the window. I felt like I was in the movie "Abduction", when Lily Collins and Taylor Lautner were in the train with similar cubicles. I was being chased after just the same as he was. Hopefully I'd win too.