I keep thinking about the night my mother died , what my uncle said , and what happened after that , the unspeakable crime I committed. You will probably think I'm crazy , and you would be right to think so. I deserve no mercy for what I've done , nor do I expect any. God is witness to my insanity , and my judge. Surely , He will show me no mercy.
My mother died of brain cancer. I watched her day after day , week after week , as her mind slowly deteriorated. I took care of her. My brother , Sam , and my sister , Cheryl couldn't handle the responsibility. They were never responsible about anything , especially when it came to money. And since I was single , with no family of my own , I had no trouble moving into her apartment to take care of her. They came to see her , but never stayed long. I wanted their help. I needed their help.
When mother became bedridden after the second relapse , I urged her to return to the hospital. But she refused anymore treatment. She said she was tired of feeling sick all the time because of the chemotherapy , and that even if she were treated again , it didn't mean there wouldn't be another relapse. She said she knew it was her time to die , and she would prefer to spend her last days at home.
There was nothing I could do ; nothing I could say , but watch her die slowly. I asked Sam , and Cheryl for their help , but it was useless asking them for anything. Cheryl was emotionally unstable , partly due to a divorce , and Sam was deep in debt to a loan shark. The last time he came , I got into an argument with him. He wanted to borrow money from me. He was always asking to borrow money , and always slow to pay it back.
I wrote him a check , without asking what it was for. Not that he would ever tell me. I was forever saving his ass , and he always came back for more.
I gave him the check and practically slammed the door in his face on his way out.
That night I sat by my mother's bed , watching her sleep. She had been sleeping entire days now , almost around the clock. She was deteriorating quickly , her mind more than her body. She wouldn't live but a week , maybe two. She was on a constant morphine drip for the pain. She had once been a vibrant , attractive woman. Now she was nothing more than withered corpse , ravaged by cancer.
I managed to fall asleep in the chair. In the morning uncle Leo called. He's my mother's older brother. When she became bedridden , I asked him to help me take care of her , since he was the only family she had besides the three of us. He refused , instead urging me to put her in a hospital , or at least hire a private nurse. Although I wasn't exactly lacking in the money department , but not rich like uncle Leo , I opted to take care of her myself. It was my duty as a loving son. She had taken care of me the times I had been ill , and now it was time for me to do the same.
"How is she?"
"She's dying ," I said.
"Have you thought about what I said?"
"Yes , I have. And it sounds crazy. Do you think I would actually consider something so insane?"
"Do you still have the card I gave you?"
"I have it."
"Then I urge you to reconsider ," he said. "If you don't , you'll never see her again."
He hung up. I removed the card from my wallet. Uncle Leo had given it to me a couple of days before. There's a way to bring her back , Richard! he had said , handing me the card. On one side were the words Resurrection Inc. , in bold lettering , and on the back , a telephone number.
"Is this supposed to be your idea of a joke?"
"No joke ," he said.
For a moment , I looked from his face -- which was dead serious -- to the card. "You want me to believe there really is a company called Resurrection Inc. , and that they actually raise the dead?"
He nodded. "Yes."
"I'm not a fool , uncle Leo. My mother is dying , and you want me to believe ... " I was too angry to finish. I flicked the card in his face. He bent down to pick it up. "Get out! Just get out , uncle Leo."
"No , Richard. This is not a joke. I wouldn't make up something like this. I know it sounds crazy -- "
"It sounds insane."
"I agree. But please take the card , in case you change your mind. Please , Richard."
He held the card out to me. Reluctantly I took it. "Now , get out."
"Alright. But I have to warn you. If you decide to go through with it , there's a chance that it might not ... that she may be ..."
"What are you trying to say?"
"Nothing. Never mind."
Uncle Leo left , and I didn't see him again until the day of the funeral , which was almost two weeks later. He kept watching me the whole time. He didn't shed one tear. I think he knew what I was thinking.
