Civil Blood

Chapter 7

“More water? Want another spoonful of rice?” Lena’s mother fussed over Haider nervously, unable to bear another long silence. He simply brushed her off with a smile and a wave of his hand. She sat back down and began to play with the ends of her sleeve.

Lena had known that this dinner would be awkward, but Haider insisted that he meet her parents. When she told them that she had a boyfriend, they weren’t exactly pleased. Her father had ranted for over an hour about decency and disrespect while her mother just looked on with sorrow. Given the reaction, Lena wanted to forget about the dinner but she worried about how Haider would feel.

So she had invited him over and they had spent the entire dinner in awkward silences only interrupted by “pass the plate”.  Her aunt was away visiting her sister, so the four were alone in the apartment. Lena’s father decided to speak up.

“So do you work Haider?” The tension in the air was palpable.

Haider acted like he had not heard the question, and continued to chew his food. Finally he finished chewing and looked at Lena’s father with a cold stare.  “I do this and that. When I get a chance.” He paused for a second and the room was deathly still. “Do you work?”

Lena’s father flinched at the obvious intimidation and stuttered out a response. “I … I’m a tailor.”

“I see.” Haider looked back down at the food and Lena noticed her father’s alarmed countenance.

“Mama, baba, I’m going to show Haider my room, if that’s alright.” Her father didn’t look very happy, but her mother nodded.

"Of course that's not alright Lena. You think I'll let you in a room with just this boy?" He was ticked off now, but still a little hesitant. He was trying to be commanding but fooling no-one.

"Don't worry, Mr Sarraf, I don't bite." Haider grinned widely, but it was not a pleasant smile. To Lena's father, it looked an awful lot like the smile of a shark, spying a wounded prey.

"If you will, Lena, but the door must be open and you are only allowed to show him around. Then Mr ..."

"Deeb." Haider filled in the blank.

"Then Mr Deeb has to leave, I'm afraid. It would be improper for him to stay any longer than that."

Haider paused a moment to consider this agreement, and then nodded, once. Lena pulled at Haider’s arm and they got up from the table.

“Mrs Sarraf, shukran. The dinner was delicious.” Haider followed Lena into her room and shut the door behind them. He threw himself down on the bed and lit up a fag, then blew out the match. Lena went straight to the window and flung it open – she wanted to see the stars.

“You saw the way he looked at me, didn’t you? Like I was beneath him because I don’t have a job.” Haider sat hunched over on the end of the bed, but Lena ignored him and didn’t move.

“I do what I can, you know. And your father treated me like dirt!”

“I don’t think he meant it like-” Lena turned her back to the window and tried to calm Haider down but his anger was just building by the second.

He leapt up from the bed and began pacing in the tiny room. “I know what he meant Lena!” Worried by his rage, Lena tried to grab hold of his elbow. “Do you think I’m stupid?” Haider abruptly spun around, his elbow flying back and catching Lena on the chin. She tripped backwards and landed on her back awkwardly. A throbbing pain shot through her and she groaned in agony.

Haider was beside her in an instant. “I’m so sorry Lena, are you alright?” He pulled her to her feet, supporting her around the waist as she winced. He led her to the bed where she collapsed painfully. Already she could tell that her back would be sore for a while, and it would be a miracle if her chin wasn’t bruised.

“It’s okay Haider, I’m … okay. Maybe you should just go.” The care on his face was wiped away instantly and a hard blankness replaced it. He dropped her hand like it was on fire and shoved his cigarette into his mouth firmly.  Then he gave her one last look over before leaving and slamming the door behind him. The sound of Haider saying goodbye to her parents floated through the walls. The door banged shut and he was gone.

Lena’s head fell into her hands and she let a few tears drop, then composed herself. She listened out for the inevitable footsteps that would lead to her room, but there were none. The only noise was that of furniture scrapping along the floor as her parents got ready for bed. Surely they must have heard the argument through the thin walls, but even so, they never came to talk to her.

When all was still Lena hesitantly leaned forward into a standing position, and went to the window. The stars were there, as always. Lena loved everything about the stars – their brilliance, their luminosity, their constant nature. But especially the constellations, stories that could keep her dreaming for hours.

As a young child, she had soaked up the stories about these mysterious lights and now, she knew them by heart. She had even made up her own, an endless supply of tales and fables.

Stories about love, betrayal, humour and jealousy. The only stories she didn’t enjoy were those about war – they were too close to home.

There was the old man just to the left of the North Star, with the bird cage in one hand and the cat in the other. He was eternally trying to keep the two apart, a struggle that went on forever.

There was the ever hungry fish which had searched high and low for all the food in the world, and when it had finished  it all, had went to the stars in search of more.

As she stood and reflected on her old friends, the fish, cat and bird, the seamstress, the king and the ladybird, her mind turned to Haider.

She was in turmoil. Haider was exciting, knowledgeable, romantic. But he was also unpredictable, and his eyes could turn cold and calculating. Lena hated to admit it, but Haider scared her at times. The way he acted tonight had only shown that in more clarity.  

But he made her smile, and she loved that about him. In fact, she might even be falling for him. Lena always wanted to be around him, to talk about Shakespeare and stupid things, like their favourite food or childhood dreams.

And when they kissed, it sent tingles down her spine and made her heart beat just a little faster. Haider was definitely right for her. Wasn’t he?

She shut the window with a click. It wasn’t the time to ponder this. She returned to bed.

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A/N Sorry for the long delay, my laptop broke on me! 

Not so fun fact, unemployment in Gaza is at 32% and has been as high as 43%

Shukran = Thanks 

Shukran for reading!