A Martyr's Guide to Thievery

Introduction: So You Think You Can Steal

So You Think You Can Steal?

Being a thief isn't for everyone.

I'm not going to sit here and tell you that it's simple, or that a caveman could do it, or that its cool, or use any other kind of propaganda. I'm here to be honest, and the honest truth is that it's risky, it's stressful, and sometimes the rewards are little to nothing. You have to lie, pretend, tear down everything and everyone that gets in the way. You trust no one. You have to be clever, quick, leave no room for shame. Once you jump in, there's no getting out. Once the shovel's in the ground, there's no climbing out of that hole. Maybe there's no job application, but there's a shitload of prerequisites. 

So if this is going to be your profession, here's what comes first and foremost; chuck the rules out the window. You have to throw caution to the wind, say "screw it," take the risk willingly and make it worth every consequence. 

You can't afford to pause, you can't afford to love, you can't afford to think. 

Just act. 

And remember, being a thief isn't for everyone, but anyone can be a thief.