Ex's and Oh's

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I do not own Suicide Squad or Gotham in any way. I only own my OC.


"There's been a massive breakout at Arkham Asylum. There are no details yet as to how this happened or who might have done it. GCPD is working with security at the asylum to round up the escapees. A list of the escapees has not been released to the public yet".

The Joker and Lily exchanged looks.

"Who do you think did it?" Lily asked him.

"Don't know. Don't care", the Joker said getting up from the couch.

"But...don't you have enemies in Arkham?" Lily asked.

"None that would dare come after me", he told her.



That night, the two were woken up by banging on the door.

The Joker slid out of bed and grabbed his gun. He cocked it and made his way to the front door. He opened the door and found Harley standing on the other side.

"Puddin'!" she yelled, throwing her arms around his neck, "Miss me?"

The Joker resisted the urge to blow her brains out. "Harley, it's 3 in the morning", the Joker told her, "You woke me and Lily up".

Harley let go of him. "Lily? Ya mean the cute archer wasn't lyin' to me?" she asked.

"Harley?!" the two heard.

Lily was standing in the room wearing nothing but her pink negligee.

"Heya Lily!" Harley said.

Both the Joker and Harley were unprepared for Lily pulling a gun on her.

"Lily..." Harley said.

"Shut-up!" Lily hissed.

The Joker watched on in amusement.

"You left me", Lily said.

"It wasn't my fault!" Harley insisted, "It's his! He let them cart me off to Arkham". She pointed at the Joker.

"Why? Because you loved him so much?" Lily asked, "Or because of your own stupidity for loving him?"

"But you love him too!" Harley told her.

"Yes, but unlike you, if my life was in danger, I would leave him", Lily said, "I look out for my own interests first! You should have thought of me before you ran off with him! You left me alone! Mother practically shut down when you went missing".

"I'm sorry", Harley said.

"Sorry isn't going to fix this", Lily said cocking the gun.

The Joker walked over to the youngest Quinzel. "Lily..." he cooed as her hands started to shake.

Lily wanted nothing more than put a bullet in her sister's brain. "I should call the GCPD right now and have you taken back to Arkham", Lily breathed.

"Calling the police would lead them straight here and all of three of us will be taken to Arkham", the Joker told her, "So just put the gun down and..."

"No!" Lily yelled.

The Joker grabbed her and aimed the gun at the ceiling as it went off.

Lily dropped the gun, breathing heavily.

"Ya tried to kill me. Your own sistah", Harley said.

"You're not my sister. You stopped being my sister the moment you jumped in bed with him", Lily spat. She threw the Joker's arms off of her. "Who orchestrated the breakout?" Lily asked Harley.

"How should I know?" she said.

"Tell me before I strangle you with my bare hands!" Lily yelled.

"I dunno! He was short and he walked funny!" Harley told her.

"Penguin", the Joker growled, "I'll fucking kill him!"

"I'll help", Lily spat.



The three made their way to Penguin's nightclub.

They walked in and all chatter and music stopped.

"I'm glad I have your full attention", the Joker said, jumping up onto a table, "I'd like to speak to the owner".

"He's hot when he gets mad", Harley told Lily.

"I know", Lily said smirking.

Penguin stepped forward. "May we speak alone?" Penguin asked.

"Very well. Girls, entertain yourselves", the Joker said, jumping down.

The Joker dragged Penguin into the back room and brought his feet out from under him with his cane. "What were you thinking? Are you trying to drive me crazy? Oh wait...too late for that", the Joker said and laughed, "Breaking out my ex?" The Joker pulled a dagger out of his coat and said, "You and I are going to have some fun".



When the Joker exited the back room, he was shocked at what he found.

Harley and Lily were dancing together on the stage as the music played.

They were clearly drunk going off of the empty bottles that littered the stage.

Lily  locked eyes with him and jumped down from the stage, leaving Harley  dancing by herself

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Lily locked eyes with him and jumped down from the stage, leaving Harley dancing by herself. She strutted up to him and ran her hands down his chest.

"Having fun?" he asked her.

Lily looked up at him from under her lashes and nodded. Lily turned around and rubbed herself on him trying to get him to dance with her.

He was about to refuse when he felt someone behind him.

Harley threw her arms around his neck from behind.

The Joker smirked as the two rubbed their bodies against his.

He could get used to this.

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