Dear Mom,
Remember me? You're daughter? The one you replaced with drugs? I've been staying with Grandma for the past few weeks but you probably never noticed I left. Did you? I didn't get one fucking phone call from you, so I'm going to suppose you forgot about me.
You're a shitty ass parent. I had nightmares when I was 8 years old as I watched Daddy commit suicide in front of my eyes. I wasn't supposed to see it, but I entered the room at the wrong time. I loved Daddy more than I could ever love you. You didn't do anything to stop the nightmares mom. I still have them...
I don't know if I'm ever coming back. Your new boyfriend Hector who you met in the club? I don't like the way he looks at me. I know that if I stay around him, he's going to take advantage of me eventually...
I have a question for you. What the fuck do I do? Grandma is turning 96 this year. She's going to die eventually. I need somewhere to live, with someone who will care for me and love me. You don't do either of those damn things. You stopped as I began to grow up.
Honestly, I can say I miss you Mom. I miss the old you. You aren't yourself anymore... you're a ghost of your old self. You spend most of your time sitting at the kitchen table, eyes hazy, sulking. Why the fuck are you sulking? You could have a good life if you just did something with yourself! When I think about how stupid you are, it makes tears come to my eyes. But as of right now, that doesn't matter because as I write you this letter I'm bawling. I don't know if the tears will ever stop.
I don't know if I'll ever see you again, Mom. But I don't think I want to see you again. Not like this.
Get some help Mom.
From Pauline
